Saturday September 22nd
(jump earlier)
I just realized for how long I've been around here: 4 entire years.
Obviously, when you realized something like that you start thinking and figuring out how much changed in your life in that time.
What did happened in my life in the last 4 years?
- I finished school. Working in my thesis right now (literally right now, I'm working on it).
- I got a job, resign and I'm in a new one right now.
- I got to know the snow (even in BA, which is completely crazy) and Mar del Plata.
- Met incredibly people, but they were "temporary" friends. Meaning. They were great, touched my life in many ways, but for some reason or the other, we didn't keep in touch (yeah, Al comes in this point -although we did keep in touch-, also as many teachers from school, etc.)
A lot happened and a lot of little things changed, but there's nothing B-I-G that I can think of. I mean, finishing school was something important to me because the fact that I got to go to school and study what I wanted against everybody's wishes, is big enough to me. Finishing it was just part of that process. After fighting for so long to study that and nothing more than that, I would never give up.
The job... well that was a big change, remember that time? I was sick all the time for the stress... I guess that "big" change was just big to myself... it's normal to change jobs, specially when you're young... so it's not a big deal either. People do get all excited when they hear where I work, but to me, it's not a big deal anymore. It's just a job.
Getting to know the snow and the coast city. Eh. It was OK. It was huge in THAT time but if you come and ask me what I did in the last 4 years, I wouldn't even say it. I just said it because I didn't know what else to say.
Why am I thinking about this kind of things? It's not New Year's Eve yet, right?
Well, all of this comes in the exact time when I found out (through a friend of a friend) that one of the guys from our group in Peru is getting married, actually he already did by now.
I fell in love with this guy the moment I met him in Perú. We became best friends. He went back to Ecuador after 3 months or so, but we always kept in touch. We eventually remained as really good friends (nothing happened) I traveled there for a wedding (the very same travel I got to know J better), then he moved to BA when I came back. For some reason we just lost contact when he was living in here (well, a lot of you would understand, the first year in BA wasn't particulary easy to me, and the next couple of years I had a gigant job just trying to survive each day), and he moved back to Ecuador this year, after spending an extra year in Perú.
Out of no where last Wednesday found out he was getting married this past Friday. I was in shock.
And for some reason it affected me.
As soon as I found out I wrote an email to a friend in common and Mae of course. They were the only two people in the world who could understand what I felt.
Mae wrote me this "I'm-so-shock" email asking me how I was doing and how affected I was by that new.
My other friend, was a doll. Even when we haven't spoken for months, he knew exactly what to say.
In that email, he wrote an update on his life and family. His daughter is 9  . I met her when she was a child!!!! a baby! His little sister is already in college, second year! and is living by herself in USA. I remember her like the little girl who couldn't go to the mall alone and his older sister is married and her daughter is 2 years old!
When it came to the point when he had to talk about himself he didn't have much to say. So he just said "well, I'm still single... alone. Working a lot as usual". Which is pretty much the same I could say about myself.
It's cool. I mean it could be worse, but when you meet with old friends they don't wanna hear about your exciting job, or how happy you are about your last promotion and that kind of stuff, and that, sometimes is annoying.
Well, you're not married and you're currently alone but for how long have you been alone? "Well, pretty much since you met me"...
Some people would think there's something wrong with you... so young so alone. So lonely sometimes.
I understood what he felt when he wrote that. My answer was a complete email of complains about my singlehood LMAO.
I still haven't figure out why I'm so annoyed right now.
Well, I better keep working in my thesis or I'd never end it.
S. |
posted Saturday September 22nd, @07:02PM
Saturday September 8th
(jump earlier later)
This last couple of weeks have been super busy at the office. The week before this one, my coworker got sick and I had to handle the entire office. Believe it or not, it was something good to me, because I could do it all and at the same time I worked and worked and worked and before you realized, I have everything planned out until the last week of October I can't believe it myself, trust me.
I did have a couple of very tense moments in the way, you know? But after asking my boss' permission to change a couple of things in our schedule and explaining her why those changes were not bad, everything took its place and now, I can pretty much say I can relax for the next two months because everything is going the way they should go.
In the other hand, I had to get in charge of my coworker's program, and from the last 10 episodes in total, 7 will be all mine. That's because I closed up the deals during this last two weeks. During this last week I wrote my very first script of her show. It sucked and almost fainted when I didn't know what the heck the presenters were going to do, but my boss ended up fixing it. She said it wasn't "that bad". I'll have a second chance in a couple of weeks when I have to give her my second script, and I think it's not going to be that bad either because when I went to see the place I could easily see the presenters in there.
In the other hand, my episodes are going great. As the next 5 episodes are the finals one of my show, my boss asked me to find "the" places... and I still can't believe it but I DID IT!!!!!!! I can't say I'm fully relaxed but as they won't be shoot until next month, I don't know, many things can happen, so next week I'll keep signing places just in case.... so I'm keeping myself calm down... and I'll cheer up as soon as we shoot them all.
So.. life's been nice to me in the work's area. Health is getting better, I'm doing rehab of my foot. I started last week and it's a little pain because I have to get up really early to do it, then the foot hurts the entire day... But oh well, it's gonna be better in the long term.
Personal. Mmm, what can I say? After dissapearing for about 10 days, Mae wrote me an email saying she couldn't travel on January. She is not ending classes until February. So, out of the blue, she's not coming with us.
After waiting for so long, the plane ticket is 1000U$S more expensive than I thought (meaning, my budget just went to hell). And Maia, my other friend coming, doesn't wanna hear a thing about going anywhere else but there.
Yesterday I had a few moments alone in the office and sat down to work in a new budget. Cut some expenses here, some others in there. I think I can make it, but not without my parent's help. Which sucks. I wanted to do it by myself... In the entire trip, I would be spending twice the budget I planned a couple of months ago and I'm really annoyed by that.
I promised Maia I'd try to talk with my parents this weekend to see how much money they can give me (OBVIOUSLY I'll pay them back. Not everything together but a little bit every month).
My dad have been pushing me into selling my car. I hated the idea. It's true I don't use it much (I don't go to work in my car), but selling the car to do a trip? When will I ever get a car back? mmm... don't know.
I'll try to encourage myself into talking with them this weekend, I'll re think the car thing, and maybe next week we'll be able to do our so wanted reservations.
Gotta go now, I wanna wash my car before the entire neighborhood starts walking around!
S. |
posted Saturday September 8th, @09:31AM
Saturday September 1st
(jump earlier later)
Thank you :)
He might not be the one. But meeting him, going out with him helped me to take my friend out of my head. I'm so releaved. I'm finally back. This week I can pretty much say I'm the old friend and I'm loving it. There's a heavy bag I no longer carry with me.
Thank you Al, you also made me see that I'm finally ready, and it's not so hard to give those little steps to persue whatever I'm looking for.
S. |
posted Saturday September 1st, @11:21PM
Tuesday August 28th
(jump earlier later)
I'm losing my mind
Tomorrow with more time I'll write something else, but i heard today that the company is going to chose people to go for at least 4 months go Colombia, Venezuela, Mexico and US.
The fist country to open is Colombia. We'll see what happens next. I spoke with my boss today about it but didn't know much.
Well, better run!
S. |
posted Tuesday August 28th, @09:06PM
Sunday August 26th
(jump earlier later)
I have to finish some stuff. Still didn't get the stupid NZ book I want to read to start planning our trip. I went to 15 different bookstores!
I just found a couple. One was from 1995 (I want to imagine things have changed since then) so I didn't even waist any money on it, and today I found one from 2005 but it was WAY too expensive and it wasn't just about NZ.
Maybe I'll end up buying that one.
The hostel manager told me she'd borrow me one from the hostel. That'd be cool, but I'd understand if she doesn't do it next Tuesday because after all, what guarantees does she have of me returning it? I will, but she doesn't know what kind of person I am, right?
Ok, gotta run. Wish me luck next Tuesday 
S. |
posted Sunday August 26th, @05:18PM
Saturday August 25th
(jump earlier later)
Could I be any dumber?
I better email you about this Chris! |
posted Saturday August 25th, @02:01PM
Sunday August 19th
(jump earlier later)
3 entries in 24 hours is a lot, right?
Well... I just I have to take this out.
Last night I had this weird 3.3 hour-chat with him. He is pretty much in the middle of a crisis. He tried to explain me his crisis but to me, everything was simpler than he thought.
One of the crisis points was his relationship with his ex gf (yeah, the crazy-beating one). He surprised me when he said he didn't know if he could consider that door as completely closed. He's always around her (and she's around him as well).
After talking about it for a while, he said he thinks he won't be able to say it's completely closed until being attached to a new girl. (REEEEEEEED FLAG HERE)
I told him that to me, it was REALLY idiotic what he was saying. How can you be fine with someone if you're not fine with yourself? Besides, this means he's not looking for a new girl, he's just looking for a damn Band Aid!
I used to understand his old position, not wanting anything serious was very much coherent to me (at least that was his position a couple of days ago), but the new one, God! How can you say that? I asked him you're wanting to take one girl out with a new one and he said YES! I told him, in my eyes, it was COMPLETELY unfair for both girls involved. In first place with his ex because it means than anyone can help him get over her... so does it mean that the 3 years relationship meant nothing? Is THAT easy to get over it?
In the other hand, the new girl: she'd be nothing more and nothing less than a fucking band aid: you're not here because I want to be with you, you're just here because you're helping me to forget somebody else (well, this OBVIOUSLY upsets me because I wouldn't like to be in that position).
He said he knew it was unfair, but he couldn't help to think that way.
Then, he started attacking me, asking me why I was so single after so long... and before I could answer he said "if you tell me you're fantastic by yourself and that's why you're alone, I'll kick your ass". I didn't know what to answer, I swear.
How do I tell him: "I'm waiting for you to be ready, asshole."
Well, I told him that I'd obviously love to be involved in a serious relationship with someone, but for some reason I'm not... and after waiting for so long, why would I have to settled for less?
Today while talking with Maia, I found out the right answer to that question. "I'm alone because I've been waiting for the wrong person" LOL.
I swear if he starts with his attitude again, that's the answer he'll get.
Oh, BTW, while I was telling him he was too-pasive and always complaining about what's wrong but never does anything to change that, that was the moment he chose to tell me he's trying to change that and btw, he has a date the day after tomorrow with this old classmate he hasn't seen in 3 years.
Iiiiiiiiiiiiiiii just don't know anymore...
Kick me. I deserve it.
Well I better go back to my thesis.
S. |
posted Sunday August 19th, @09:58PM
(jump earlier later)
Inconsolable
I close the door
Like so many times, so many times before
Filmed like a scene on the cutting room floor
I wanna let you walk away tonight without a word
I try to sleep, yeah
But the clock is stuck on thoughts of you and me
A thousand more regrets unraveling
OOoh, if you were here right now,
I swear I'd tell you this
[Chorus:]
Baby I don't wanna waste another day
Keepin it inside, it's killing me
Cause all I ever wanted comes right down to you (to you)
I wish that I could find the words to say
Baby I would tell you, every time you leave
I'm inconsolable
I climb the walls, yeah
I can see the edge,
But I can't take the fall, no
I've memorized the number
So why can't I make the call
Maybe cause I know you'll always be with me
In the possibility
[Chorus]
No, no, no
I don't wanna be like this
I just wanna let you know
That everything I hold in
Is everything I can't let go (oooh, can't let go)
Cause BABAYYYYY
[Chorus]
Don't you know it baby
I don't wanna waste another day
I wish that I could find the words to say
Baby I would tell you, every time you leave
I'm inconsolable
Yeah, yeah, yeah
Oooh, I'm inconsolable
Whoaa yeah
I'm inconsolable
Well, I'm not "inconsolable" everytime he leaves, but... the part of "I climb the walls, yeah - I can see the edge, but I can't take the fall, no - I've memorized the number, so why can't I make the call - Maybe cause I know you'll always be with me in the possibility
That last sentence is EXACTLY what I feel... does it make any sense?
Well... lately I've been better, it's not like I'm burning inside to tell him, so I better keep it down... time will tell...
S. |
posted Sunday August 19th, @01:54PM
Saturday August 18th
(jump earlier later)
Seems like my dentist's waiting room will be the place where I'll write the most. A laptop and wi fi connection would be really cool. I wouldn't need to write down here and then type it at home. Well I have nothing better to do, so I'll stop complaining about that...
Updates:
- Well, the most exciting one is that now that i know when my vacations will be I'm starting to ask for prices for our travel. "us" are Mae and I, but I'll keep asking if someone else will join us.
Our first destination was US with a cruise I've been wanting to attend for like forever. But that cruise is in December and my vacations are in January.
Then Mae came up with the idea of going to Europe (2 young girls with no strings attached... seems like "the" time to do it) After all, US will always be more accessible than Europe. But let's be honest. Europe is really expensive and after freezing my ass in the coldest winter in 45 years, I'd like to spend summer in a warm place.
The next idea was going to China to visit my brother in law, but as you already know we can't.
So I started looking for other options and then I remembered that one of my friends I met in Perú is living in Australia and as I watch the TV show "The Block" (From Bondi, Australia) and after some research I'm dying to go to New Zealand (Australia is out because of the distances between cities, NZ is smaller and we can do it with a car).
I found this great site. I was surprised for how well translated it was and found out it was from a tourist agency that belongs to an Argentinean couple living in NZ... WE'RE EVERYWHERE!
I wrote them an email and she's super nice. Next week will send me an email with the latest prices I asked. I'm surprised to know it's not as expensive I thought it'd be.
She also recommended me spending some nights in Fiji (sound GREAT) and my vote goes to do that in the last days. So we spend around 21 nights around NZ and the last 4 in Fiji, full relaxing days, laying on the beach and getting ready to go back home.
I also found this blog of a Spanish couple. They went for their honeymoon and their tour was very similar to the one I'd like to do. Great help, let me say.
Well, Mae's been gone for like two weeks now and still had no clue of everything I just wrote. I hope she likes this new destination! I'm just so excited about it...
Other Updates:
- Friend: Last Friday he came over to our "Poker Night At Home" We had a blast. I won  He had dinner with us, then Poker and then spent time with my brothers playing PC games and blah.
After that we didn't talk till last night. My brother invited him again (they chat now) and as they can't send SMS to each other (for some strange reason) I had to write him to ask him if he was coming. Finally he didn't 'cause he was too tired after school (his class ended around 11PM). At that time I was already bathed, in my PJ's and in bed, so I was more releaved than anything.
- Work: a couple of days ago, my boss told me she was told I had to take an exam. We still don't know what the heck that means. If I fail, they'll fire me? They just hired me! Next week she'll borrow me a book and I'll have to study... (I'm reaaaaaaaaaaally happy about that... mmm... not) Out of that, working life's been quiet. We didn't tape this week and we won't next either, so everything's been reeeeaaally quiet, I've been even doing the NZ research in there.
- Family: we'll we've just passed a little rough week.
My mom caught one of her students (she's a nursery teacher in the Army) cheating in one of her exams. This girl was 2 months from graduation and my mom had to expel her. So she was pretty down. But cheating is REALLY our of the limits in the Army and how would you feel if your nurse don't know what to do because she cheated in her test?
My brother (the Army one) in the other hand got kicked out of this "super important" course. If he fails it he won't be able to promote and his career will be over (at 30 yo, great huh?). He has 2 chances of doing it and he just got kicked out in the first one in the very first day because of an "administration mistake"(don't even wanna talk about it of I'll get in my assassin mood again).
So next year he'll have to be "the best of the best" to get the second chance of doing it. I strongly believe that in the next 12 months he'll end up asking the retirement. He's very tired of this kind of things.
So, he was supposed to stay until last week of September and now is going back home tomorrow! 
After planning the 1st year-bday party for my nephew, we won't even be able to spend that day with him.
So this week's hasn't been the happiest one at home, as you may imagined.
Well, after 1.30h of waiting the doctor just called and say he wasn't coming (what a darling) So I'll just wait for my brother and go back home...
What a waist of a morning
S. |
posted Saturday August 18th, @02:24PM
Saturday August 4th
(jump earlier later)
.
A couple of weeks ago I started writting this winning post. Now things have changed, pretty much (even while in the process of writing it things started to change), but I'm posting it anyway to make very clear how things changed. So here it is:
July 21st. / Dentist Waiting Room.
It's amazing how and how much things have changed in the last few months.
Now I really don't have much time to do anything but work. Well, there's not much wish to either. I do not work on weekends so I have 2 days to do whatever I'd like to, but I just rather staying in bed as much as I can. I always say I have to keep working in my thesis but then I spend time doing all the whatevers I can't do during the week. At the beggining of the week when you ask me what I did on my free days my answer will remain the same: "not much: movie, tv and that's pretty much it."
As I don't chat as much as I used to (I don't get online from work) I haven't been much in touch with anybody either. I did see my "friend" a couple of weekends ago. We had dinner, went to a jazz concert and finished the night at a pool bar. Had a blast. After that, we spoke once online, SMS yesterday on friend's day and that's it.
BTW his ex (beating/crazy) gf was staying at his house after being kicked out of the dorm she was renting. Those ons and offs with that girl totally turned me off.
Been there, done that (on high school for God's sake!) and living a soap opera at 26 is really far away from the kind of relationship I'd like to have now.
So I'be been trying to stay away from him a while. I really miss him and I know that whenever he hooks up with a new girl I'll be mad at myself for not staying around but he's been changing a lot after the break up and he's no loner the sweet and caring guy I was fliping about.
I do believe that after a nasty break up there's damage control to make... But I don't know... I don't feel like doing somebody else's laundry, specially when I don't see a great reward.
July 23rd. / In the train going to the office
Well after I wrote all that, I received a SMS saying the ex is out and he's on vacations, so "I can go whenever I want to have dinner" and as dumb as it sounds I told him I'm free next week Friday night... I know, I know... but I'm his friend, turning the back is not friendly, is it?
Also after writting about my abandoned thesis, I spent Saturday night until 5AM working on it. Seems writing "out" helps me to move my ass for once in a while...
How's work? I have my GREAT days and my really bad ones. My boss is REALLY demanding and when you make a mistake she can treat you as shit. It's almost funny I've learned not to pay her attention when she's mad because after yelling comes the regret moment (she makes me remember myself when I was at school and my classmates would drive me crazy, I'd yell and then realize I over reacted). On that page, I understand her. What I cannot comprehend is how she hasn't changed. She knows it's "wrong" and annoying, (sometimes even hurtful) to be this way, so why doesn't she change?
I saw that and did. Then if I could do that, I think anybody can.
Today:
Well things changed... the work page had the biggest change of all. After a lot of anticipation, yesterday Fox told us we were going to be part of the staff (something REALLY weird in cable TV here) so we signed everything. Next Monday I have to say who's the beneficiary of my life insurance, have to pick up the health plan and the retirement.
I was told I have an entire month of vacations but I have to take them always in January, not having the chance of choosing another month (sadly, I was wanting to go to China in February... more explanations later).
This is my first REAL-REAL job... so I'm SUPER excited.
Also, after just 2 months I got a raised :D:D:D So I get to pay all my taxes without losing money, but making more money than before... so yeah, life's been good in that page.
In the other hand, last night I went to my friend's house... as soon as I got there, guess who rings the bell? the (crazy/beating) ex gf!!!!!!!! She didn't come up, he went downstairs and gave her a couple of letters that arrived for her... but did she REALLY have to go last night? They're seeing each other today (he's helping her with a moving stuff)... BIG TURNOFF, let me say.
Nothing was going to happen anyway, I mean, I went there as a friend and a friend only... but I was in shock lol... imagining how things would have been if we ran into each other downstairs LOL... I just can't wait to tell about this to Mae.
Oh.. and last night before going to his place I went to my school's library and got 3 books for my thesis (big yay to me!) I really wanna end this now because getting my degree will help me win a few points at the office
So... life's been changing and I'm loving it. I hate when things stay still... now that I know when my vacations are I can start really planing them... it'll be my graduation trip so we gotta do it B-I-G. China's been calling our door but we won't be able to make it (my brother in law is going there in a couple of weeks for an entire year. he was going to receive us there but he has vacations during February only and won't be able to see us on January), so I think Europe is going to be our Plan A (it was our original plan), cruising the Caribbean (Plan B) and Plan C is still undecided... I'll do some research this weekend so I can start booking everything, because before you realize everything costs twice...
Ok I better go, tons of things to do! Tonight we're having a reunion at home to say goodbye to my brother in law, so the house is upsidedown...
Better run!
S. |
posted Saturday August 4th, @10:30AM
Sunday July 1st
(jump earlier later)
Wow... time flies when you're super busy, huh?
Just came to post so I wouldn't leave the last depressing post up, because life's been better lately.
I keep working my ass off in the new office. It's going OK. Good and bad days are always around, but in general if you ask if I'm happy with the change I'd say definitely.
The girls from the old office call me once in a while to ask how I'm doing and to ask me to rescue them several times. The place is still a kaos, my old boss is still an ass, so.... I can pretty much say I'm glad I left, because nothing changed there.
The new job... what can I say... I'm still the new-girl. At first I didn't have much to do 'cause I knew nothing. Now I'm suppossed to know everything, and that sometimes is a problem, specially when you have a boss who wants you to know everything about anything, and that's not my case yet.
The good new is that I passed the so-feared month of trial, which is already more than the previous 4 girls, and that's amazing.
Next Friday night we'll be shotting my very first show, I wrote the script of it. I'll be interesting and you can bet it'll be REALLY STRESSFUL, because until now I just assisted... now even when I'm not in charge (my boss is always in charge) anything she needs to know should be replied by me... if I don't know the answer, I better find out before she realizes I don't know it LOl.
Well the lunch bell is ringing, I better go to the kitchen.
See ya around.
S. |
posted Sunday July 1st, @11:34AM
Sunday June 10th
(jump earlier later)
Now that's been officialy over, I can pretty much said that this year's bday was the worst one ever.
The one person I wanted to remember it, didn't.
My parents, who've been pushing me to "organize" a dinner, out of no where organized a barbacue with their friends for this morning. So no cake, no bday song, not even a freaking dessert (even when I've been asking my mom for an entire month to cook a special one and she said she would be doing it for my bday).
They did say happy bday, maybe I should be thankful they did remember, at least.
For once in my life, I just wanted them to do something special for me, maybe THEY could organize something instead of waiting for me to run everything as usual. I know I'm the organizer in here, but if I organize Christmas and New Year's Eve when everybody was busy or gone, can't they organize something for my bday? I don't expect anything big or special (after 26 years I've learn that kind of things don't run in their blood) but ANYTHING NOT-ORGANIZED BY MYSELF.
One of my best friends kept pushing me around all week to organize something and I said I didn't feel like partying (which was true because I knew "he" was forgetting it, always with the hope to being wrong and being surprised today) and she kept saying out loud what a bitter person I am... but then, during this last 3 days she kept saying we'd do this, and we'd do that, and then never showed up.
Thursday I was suppossed to come back home with her. After all the previous day I waited for her an hour at 10PM at the office so she could come back with me. Then when we arrived home we had to wait for 30 minutes for her dad to show up.
The next day, she said she'd take ME home. After waiting for an hour at the office she calls and said she was sorry but she was having dinner at a restaurant with her parents so she wasn't going home... so.... I had to take the subway and train. I don't mind doing that, but I'd have liked to know it earlier and not after an hour wait.
Then, Friday she said we HAD to get out. I wasn't in the mood with her and told her I didn't want to do anything. So she pushed and pushed and said that before going home she was coming to my office and drag me somewhere. I told her not to say that kind of things that as her bf was going to be available that weekend after all, she was going to go running to him. She said NO WAY, she was going out with me.
Guess what? Around 6PM when I asked her boss where she was she said "Oh, she left early, she went to see her bf". No bye, no nothing! How hard is it to write a fucking sms to say: I'm going home or whatever!
Then, she kept saying that RIGHT after going out of the office at Saturday (yesterday, my bday) she was coming directly to my house. I told her I didn't know where I'd be by then, and she said she didn't care, she was calling to find out where I was and would come to meet me.
Well, she called her bf (who was at my house) and told him she was coming. That was around 4.
So I didn't go out, it'd be rude to leave my house knowing she was coming, right?
Well... guess what????????????? SHE DIDN'T SHOW UP AT ALL! (maybe because her bf was out of my house by 4.30.
At 6 I was in a REALLY bad mood so I went to take a nap and she called around 7. I didn't get up obviously.
At night I went to have dinner with my siblings and in laws to the shopping center (I didn't feel like having for dinner old barbacue from the microwave) and she wrote asking me where I was going after the movies, to let her know so she could meet me.
We exchanged several sms and she asked me to let her know when the movie was over to see where we could meet. But then, during the movie (when I obviously had my cell phone off) she sent an sms saying she had a little fever, but she was deffinitaly (SP?) coming to wherever we were.
Well I texted her telling her to stay in bed so she could rest. She didn't reply so I guess she's at her bf's or she's sleeping or whatever... I don't care...
I'm in terrible mood, I don't even bare myself right now, so I better go to bed.
But the worst of all is that even freaking Blockbuster sent an email wishing me happy bday, and HEEEEEEE DIDN'T REMEMBER! He said he couldn't come to the movies because he had a friend's bday?? After 3 years, how can't he remember that his friend and I have the same freaking bday?????????
This day sucked right from the beggining.
My new boss is right. You can't have both. If you're doing ok in your career, you can't expect to have a good personal life (she said that last Friday when she was telling us about the best year of her career was the very same year she divorced).
I better go to bed. Tomorrow will be a new day and I'll try to keep myself as far as I can from everybody.
S. |
posted Sunday June 10th, @02:23AM
Saturday June 2nd
(jump earlier later)
So... everything changed completely (again) in this last 2 weeks. I finally changed my job.
Fox people called me the last days I was in the old office and told me to sign the contract the next Monday. I did, and then I stood there looking around, when I wanted to realized it was already 8PM. The next day, at 7.30AM I was back there because we had a recording session.
I just finished my first week. I'm super happy with the change, althought I know I'm still in the "honey moon" period, I'm glad I had the courage to change.
It was hard taking the decision but once it was made, everything was easy.
I now work in a huge company with LOTS of people. The first day I introduced myself 3 times to the same guy (I didn't realize it was the same one, obviously) and when I went the 4rd time he said "Wait! You're Sol, remember me? I'm Diego" He said laughing because he knew I was going to introduce myself again. LOL. It was a huge change, after working in a 5 people-office.
I share office with the entire production team of the tv show I'm in. We're just 3. My boss (Luciana) who reminds me of myself (she's in EVERYTHING, she likes to know EVERYTHING, I swear I don't know how she does it! I think her brain has no bounderies and she keeps filling it up) and my co worker (Analia) who is super nice. She's the one teaching me everything I need to know. She lives near my house so we've been coming back almost every night together.
Oh, and Maia, my ex class mate works there too. Her office is just one office away from mine so we keep seeing each other. Last night Analia and I came back with her (She also lives in the same area we do).
Things have been great in the new job, althought I work a lot more than I used to (I used to work from 10 to 6 and now I work from 9 to... whenever) and I still don't find the time to do whatever I want during the week, I think that after a couple of weeks I'll be able to coordinate my schedule enough to have a life LOL.
In the new job I can't get online as I used to, so I do miss my chat buddies (specially my friend), but as I'm so busy I don't spend much time thinking about it.
The problem is that he doesn't like emailing much, so I don't keep in touch with him as much as I'd like to... Oh, news on his life: his ex FINALLY moved out, so things might change in this... but I personally think I'll wait a little bit longer before doing anything. ALthought he insists in hanging out with me, I'll give it a little bit more time, I don't wanna feel I'm a rebound or a band aid, you know? He doesn't seem to see things this way. Well... I do. After J died and he wanted to get closer to me I told him I wasn't the girl he was looking for by then because I couldn't really love anyone by that time... He really was going to be my band aid and I thought it was unfair for him and for J. Thank God I did.
Well, I better go. My boss asked me to write the script of the next episode (which I can't believe yet! She has so much faith in me. The girl who used to work in my position worked an entire month and never got to write an script. I worked a week and I'm already doing it), so I better write something during the weekend so Luciana has the time to correct whatever I do wrong.
See ya around,
S. |
posted Saturday June 2nd, @01:49PM
Wednesday May 23rd
(jump earlier later)
So, things changed in the last couple of weeks.
At the office everything went to hell. My boss started behaving like an idiot. The next day I saw him after talking on the phone about leaving he avoid me the entire morning and say he didn't have the time to meet with me to caht about everything. Then, he had no choice and we met. He started saying he wasn't going to pay me the 2007 vacations and extra pay check of the year because I was leaving too fast (after the way he treated me and all the shit he told me I didn't want to stay there too long, so I decided to leave the next week). I told him I didn't even know he had to pay me that so I had to check on my sister. He behave like an ass, and when I tried to help about my replacement treated me like shit saying that clearly I didn't care at all about the future of the office so that I could not worry about it (he kept saying it was going to be really easy to find a replacement to me, even when then he told my co worker he didn't know what he was going to do).
I asked my sister (the one who knows the working law from a to z) and she said he was trying to avoid to pay me something I earned. One thing has nothing to do with the other. So she typed me an email saying all that and saying he has nothing to complain about because I worked 2 years for him and he paid no taxes for my job. Then said that if he was trying not to pay me those things I should charge him 50% more of extra hours (I charged those as regular hours even when I worked them during weekends).
I resend it to him and he replied saying how bad person I was and I was out of line for treating him like that and blah blah blah and that I should stop fooling him around, that I will get payed everything "I asked for" (OMG! I'm asking him less that he should pay me in first place!).
So I replied telling him that I wasn't fooling around and the position of paying me everything is different from the position he had in our chat the previous day.
Then I offered to come this week a couple of hours per day to help my replacement. He agreed. The next day we saw each other and he paid me in cash my last salary and all the other things (like 2 extra salaries) in checks for the next couple of months.
I went yesterday and my replacement is a dork, who has no idea what's he's doing. My boss is absent as usual and doesn't help him nor tell him what he has to do.
My co workers (former now) are hysterical because they told him he had to find someone who works as a producer, someone with experience and this guy is... AN ACCOUNTANT! yeah! He used to work in ONE tiny tv show, and that's it. He has no idea of editing, no idea of producing... he's out of his element... I swear I thought it was a joke.
The girls will ask him to change him. So I can see myself going next week to train the replacement of my replacement. But I won't! LOL, my co workers told me not to go that I'm already doing the favor this week.
In the Fox job, I'm stil waiting. Things changed a lot in there so the way you hire or fire people takes a little bit more time.
But the free time is appreciate in here, I'm doing tons of things I've been wanting to do in a while. Also, because of all the stress at the office and the lack of news from the new one took a lot of me last week and I've been a little bit sick. Last Friday I almost fainted in the subway. It was scary.
Out of that topic, things are normal.
I better go, gotta have lunch before going to the office for a couple of hours.
See ya around,
S. |
posted Wednesday May 23rd, @11:38AM
Saturday May 12th
(jump earlier later)
Well... I'm back in reality, back in Buenos Aires.
It was amazing how little I wanted to come back. If I could I would have stayed in Mendoza.
Anyway, I had to come back, and I did, but as work kept being a pain in the ass, I decided to take an offer I had from Fox Network (yeah, my 5th), the best one yet, so I took it.
I still don't know when I'm starting, but I know I'll work my ass off, more hours, more days, more everything in there. I love the perspective I have for the future in there, the growing oportunities I'll have, etc.
Yesterday I told my boss I was leaving. I didn't tell him I had a new job or anything. He found a document I'm writing in the office about how everything is done in there for my replacement. So he called me and asked me if I wanted to talk with him about anything. As I knew he opened that doc, I said yes and told him everything.
I started telling him all the things I didn't like in our office (things I already spoke with him about several times in the last months). At first he started making promises (the same ones he did 6 months ago), when I made him see that I was decided to leave and to me, things were not changing in there so, he better stop making promises, he got mad and started talking bs about me, saying that in the last year I didn't do a good job, I wasn't doing my job at-all, etc.
I told him that in the last year he made me do stupid things all the time, things anybody could do and those things take time and that's why even when I'm working twice the time I used to work, I can't really do more than I'm already doing.
Then I told him that I've been checking out my classmates to see who was available but they're all working and he said "well, don't worry about it, I don't think it'll be hard to replace you". I was in shock. 5 minutes before he was saying how much he trusted me and how much he KNEW he could not worry about the office because I was the one running it, and now he says anyone could do my job.
He kept saying how wrong he's been for trusting me, that it was OBVIOUS I didn't really want to learn and to work.
I really couldn't believe all the crap he was telling me. But I wasn't surprised. When I told my workmates I was leaving I told them he would react like that, acting like I was a big cheater or something like that, and he did. Everybody kept telling me it would be stupid to react that way...
After talking with him one of my workmates came and asked me to tell her EVERYTHING. I did and she was even more mad than me. She will be now "the trust one" around, so she KNOWS he'll talk with her next Monday about this and as she is so mad I'm sure she'll tell him a piece of her mind.
Besides this, last Thursday I went to the doc. It's funny, but as I had a lot of free time in Mendoza, I started reading a few journals in here. I liked two of them so I read them all (yeap, LOTS of free time).
One of them (if the author is reading this will notice it's her) used to talk about a disease she has. As I didn't know what she was talking about I did a little search online and when reading the symptons I couldn't believe my eyes. Everything described there I was having it! For my entire life I did.
So I decided to go to the doc, once I decided to leave my office I had to do everything quickly, because in this job I can skip days (I have thousands of extra hours so I can miss several days) and went. I do have a couple of exams to do in the next couple of weeks (that's why I'm not going next Monday to the office) but as far as the doctor thinks, she said I have a disease that I think it's very similar to the one the author of the journal had! It's called IBS.
It's weird to find out that what I had has a name...
Anyway, that's my life's news for the last couple of weeks. Lots of things will be changing in the next 2... So I better keep working hard in my thesis because I won't have much time to do it after I start working in the new job.
Better go!
See ya around!
S.
PS: Chris where are you? |
posted Saturday May 12th, @12:01PM
Monday April 30th
(jump earlier later)
I'm amazed of the distance's power to change me.
I used to think that I could NEVER (and I hate saying never), would fall in love with an army man. As an army daughter, I used to hate that life style.
This last couple of weeks I stood in an Army neightborhood (my brother is in the Army too) and it amazed me how much at home I felt.
After moving out all the time during my entire life I have this constant feeling of no belonging anywhere I am. When I was there and I realized what I was feeling, I was in shock.
Then we went to this military ceremony and Oh My God! I realized I felt at home too and that i MISSED that kind of things.
Well, maybe it wasn't the place, water or air changing me but a very handsome army guy I met, who knows!? LOL
Well I better go, no TV in Mendoza, so I'm desperate to see what my VCR recorded during this last two weeks.
S. |
posted Monday April 30th, @01:55PM
Thursday April 19th
(jump earlier later)
1. ONE OF YOUR SCARS, HOW DID YOU GET IT?
The one in my left eye was made with a stair falling on me. That was when I was probably 4 years old.
2. WHAT DOES YOUR CELL PHONE LOOK LIKE?
Regular cell?
3. WHAT MUSIC DO YOU LIKE TO LISTEN TO?
I like almost all kind of music. Lots of Latin, country, etc.
4. DO YOU KNOW WHAT TIME YOU WERE BORN?
8.35 AM.
5. WHAT DO YOU WANT MORE THAN ANYTHING RIGHT NOW?
To being able to relax a little bit more. No more job problems. And… well… you know..
6. WHAT DO YOU MISS THE MOST?
Right now, my bed.
7. WHAT IS YOUR MOST PRIZED POSSESSION?
My friends
8. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE SMELL?
My nephew’s smell after taking a bath
9. DO YOU GET CLAUSTROPHOBIC?
Not really.
10. DO YOU GET SCARED IN THE DARK?
Nope.
11. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE COLOGNE / PERFUME TO WEAR?
Lavin
12. WHAT KIND OF HAIR DO YOU LIKE ON THE OPPOSITE SEX?
Just hair.
13. WHERE CAN YOU SEE YOURSELF BEING PROPOSED TO AT?
In here we don’t really have a big proposal… I can imagine myself being doing dishes and my other half saying “maybe it’s time, what do ya think?”
14. COFFEE OR ENERGY DRINKS?
coffee
15. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE PIZZA TOPPING?
Mmmm… not sure
16. IF YOU CAN EAT ANYTHING RIGHT NOW, WHAT WOULD IT BE?
A huge chocolate ice cream… lol…
17. WHO IS THE LAST PERSON YOU MADE MAD?
I think a friend for not telling him something…
18.DO YOU SPEAK A DIFFERENT LANGUAGE?
Yeap. Spanish.
19. WHAT WAS THE FIRST GIFT SOMEONE EVER GAVE YOU (OF THE OPPOSITE SEX)?
Well that one must be my father… and I was too young to remember.
20. WOULD YOU FALL IN LOVE KNOWING THAT THE PERSON IS LEAVING?
Never say never. It did happen before, it might happen again. Who knows? Hope not!
21. WHAT IS THE BEST WAY TO TELL SOMEONE HOW MUCH THEY MEAN TO YOU?
Not tell but show it every single day.
24. WHAT IS THE ONE NUMBER YOU CALL OFTEN?
My bosses’. Sad but true
25. WHAT ANNOYS YOU MOST LATELY?
1. my boss
2. my job
26. HAS ANYONE EVER SPIT ON U?
Yeah… that animal… in the zoo…
27. YOUR WEAKNESSES
I’m too lazy
28. WHAT WAS YOUR FIRST JOB?
At the laundry shop.
29. EVER DONE A PRANK CALL?
Of course
30. WHAT WERE YOU DOING BEFORE YOU FILLED OUT THIS SURVEY?
Checking emails.
31. IF YOU COULD GET PLASTIC SURGERY WHAT WOULD IT BE?
Too chicken to have a plastic surgery
32. WHY DID YOU FILL OUT THIS SURVEY?
Just losing some time
33. WHAT DO YOU GET COMPLIMENTED ABOUT MOST?
My girls LOL
34. WHAT WOULD YOU DO IF ALCOHOL BECAME ILLEGAL?
Stop drinking? LOL… I don’t really drink lately, so it wouldn’t be a problem at all.
35. WHAT DO YOU WANT FOR YOUR BIRTHDAY?
A new job LOL
36. HOW MANY KIDS DO YOU WANT?
Not sure I want kids.
37. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE?
Nope
38. DO YOU WISH ON STARS?
Yeah… but don’t really believe it will come true.
39. WHICH FINGER[S] IS YOUR FAVORITE?
Huh?
40. WHEN DID YOU LAST CRY?
Last Sunday.
41. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING?
Yes.
42. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH MEAT?
Meat?
43. ANY BAD HABITS?
I eat my finger nails. |
posted Thursday April 19th, @10:59PM
Monday April 16th
(jump earlier later)
I’m amazed by how much a person can change and for how wrong I was.
I met my boss in 2003. He was my “cool” teacher. We all paid lots of attention to him because he “knew” a lot.
I started working with him in July 2005. At first the office was a little more chaotic than expected, but I was free to do whatever I wanted, so it was cool.
Things started to changed to worse in the beginning of 2006. My boss and his business partner (another teacher) started having problems. This person was so irresponsible and didn’t care at all. Whenever he’d try to do something he’d messed up.
I started doing phone calls to follow some of his contacts and many would treat me like S***T, not understanding why I was calling when they told him to wait 6 months or so. That was something really “usual”.
To the people outside, in our office we had no communication.
Eventually my boss and his partner broke up. My boss bought the other half of the company and we thought everything was going to be better without him.
Guess what? It wasn’t.
Right after, an outsider would call and start giving orders to me and my co workers. My boss told me not to pay attention to that guy, but when this guy would call him we’d end up doing whatever he wanted us to do. OBVIOUSLY, this was a pain.
This guy got a job and couldn’t keep “working” with us, so we, again thought everything was going to be better. I know you’re thinking “it wasn’t” and you’d be right. It wasn’t better AT ALL. Our camera man got tired and resign. So we hired (against my boss wishes) a girl. (He’d joke saying now it was a girl-company).
Then my boss introduced us this new guy: The fishing man.
As our TV show has lots of fishing, this guy would be in charge of that section (he’s been a fisher all his life. BTW, he’s 22)
As soon as this guy came along problems started.
He’s a guy who thinks knows everything there has to know about.. EVERYTHING. He’d come and start giving orders to everyone. We, at first, didn’t know what to do, but as it was obvious he had our boss’ total support, we shut up and do whatever he told us to.
My boss knew we had our problems with this fisher guy (beyond personality incompatibilities) and didn’t do anything for him to change or adapt to our way of work.
And then, the guy moves in. Yes! You read it right. Our office is set in an old house and one of the rooms (sorry, offices) was empty. The fisher lost his renting contract and had no where to go. So my boss offered him to stay in the office for a couple of weeks until finding something new.
That was 4 months ago and this guy is still living there.
Suddenly the office is not an office anymore. We’re working at the fisher’s house. When we go to the office he’s still sleeping. When he wakes up, you might not being able to use the bathroom because he showers during the mornings. (his morning is my lunch time).
Also he keeps messing things up all the thing and my boss would only say “Poor guy he’s just so dumb“
Also, what bothers me a lot about this guy is that he’s a BIG-LIAR. He lies about EVERYTHING.
We had a meeting with our boss (all of us) telling him things had to change cause we couldn’t keep working like that.
Things changed a little bit but not much. He did say we were all against him because we envy him or something like that.
This guy asked permission to have a stand at a expo saying he’d do everything.
Then my boss asked me to help him getting a place to do some flyers and from there I don’t know how I ended up doing lots of things for that fucking expo. I ended up designing the flyers, as I just couldn’t do anything I liked, my friend Guido ended doing them.
Then, the guy never read the rules of the expo where it’d say you needed to have a fire ex…at your stand 24/7 from the moment you put it together.
The previous day to the expo opening I spent 4 hours looking for a place to rent it with such short notice.
The guy said he would get 1 (apparently he thinks everything’s so easy to get).
Then when I told him he had to know for sure because if he didn’t get one we’d have to rent it and if we didn’t rent the guys of the expo wouldn’t let him put the stand together. He’d then treat me like an idiot saying “who would dare not letting ME doing it?” I said: first rule in TV production, always have a plan B. And he laughed.
He annoyed me all afternoon until I had enough. So I just grabbed my stuff and took off. Yeap. I left. First time in my entire live I do that.
Next day, the guy started kissing my ass asking me favors. I replied all with my worst face with a “NO” without further explanations.
So he went to my boss and he came to me and I also told him no. As he saw I was mad he didn’t keep asking but didn’t ask what was going on either. (that’s usual in him, he doesn’t want to know).
During this day I took the firm decision of changing my job. Next job interview, I’ll go. Next job offer, I’ll take it.
I think that receiving the 4th job offer from Fox Network during that week helped with it (that was 4 days BEFORE this one).
I feel like an idiot for being loyal to a boss that couldn’t care less what’s going on in his own company. I should have taken any of the 4 job offers.
That day was so mad that I emptied my office. If you go you won’t find any personal items in there now.
After the expo was over and the fisher was out of the city, one of my workmates (as tired as me) spoke with our boss and told him everything she thought of everything. Then my boss came to me asking me how things were going at the office and I said like crap.
Told him EVERYTHING I’ve been keeping inside. Told him I was tired and was feeling lonely ‘cause he was never around and never supported us. Also told him that all the good things about that job (freedom of decision, coordinating my own schedule and above them all: flexibility) were too expensive now. There are more cons than pro in that place. He was in shock.
After this day things changed in some parts. The fishes was asked to move out (2 weeks ago, he’s supposed to be “house hunting” right now) and my boss is coming more often. I do give him more things to do and say no more easily.
And guess where I am right now?
I’m on my vacations. During one day where everything was going wrong (family, love and job) I asked my 2 weeks of vacations I was saving. When my boss asked me to take just one because he didn’t want me away for so long, I just said NO. I can’t fully disconnect myself in a week. So even when everything were wrong last Friday, I left.
SORRY; I’m on my vacations. I think it’ll be good for both of us. My boss will be able to see how much I do there and he’ll learn not to take me for granted anymore.
I am really concern of how things will be at the office this next couple of weeks but I think I’ll have no problems getting distracted by my so loving nephew
Well I better go, baby needs new diaper.
S. |
posted Monday April 16th, @02:04PM
Tuesday April 10th
(jump earlier later)
A few days ago I realized that Easter should be my favorite Holyday, after all, we get a 4 day weekend and all the chocolate you can eat without having to give any explanations!
Sadly this Easter sucked.
Last Saturday one of our dogs (actually my youngest brother's dog) Gary died. It was a horrible accident, wich somehow makes it even worse because that was an accident that could easily be prevented. Also, as all accidents, was totally unexpected.
In my house we're all acting like nothing happened and I thought I was doing ok. But last night out of no where, when I was in the shower I started crying like an idiot and I couldn't stop for a while. I'd remember his face and cry. Then I went to bed and I would wake up in the middle of the night. Remember what happened and started crying all over again.
Then I realized that I was trying to hold it all in, because I was afraid to not being able to stop crying.
Obviously this isn't like J's death at all, but it hurts like hell anyway.
Today I also realized that since J's death I didn't cry. I mean, nothing could hurt me enough to make me cry. Really cry. I didn't feel... Till now. And I rather be back into the no-feeling stage. It was easier.
After J died I realized that I had to be more open, to hug more and to say always "I love you" to those I did.
For some reason Gary was one of my favorite targets. Always there willing to be pet, loved to be hugged.
So no regrets in that area. I really couldn't tell him another I love you because I kept saying it all the time.
But... man... How can everything be as normal when he's not around? I mean, he was always the one near us. he used to sit down in the stairs and now I keep looking at the stairs waiting to see him.
Also, we have two female dogs and they're really feeling his absence. His daughter keeps following me around 24/7, doesn't want to be alone and she's very down.
This morning when I went to work, I swear, I almost pick her up and took her with me to work... I gave her to my dad and asked him to hold her until I left.
I just came back and she received me with a huuuuge party for me, it was like I've been gone for months.
Outside this, things are not ok. Maybe this is why I feel so fragil right now.
Next Saturday night, I'll take a bus and leave Buenos Aires for 2 weeks. I really need to take distance from everything and everyone.
See ya around,
S. |
posted Tuesday April 10th, @06:25PM
Thursday April 5th
(jump earlier later)
Since we moved out of our apartment I went back there a few times. We rented it so we have to go every month to get the check.
Today was my turn to go and I did.
It was nice at first to see again what used to be MY place, you know? In this two years a lot changed. Just around the corner of the building there's a brand new building of a pain control clinic I didn't even know it was suppossed to be there. The last time I checked that block there was a very old house there.
The houses that used to be in construction are finally beautiful houses and it seems like they've been there forever...
The old super market is still there, exactly the same way.
A few small business closed, other opened... but the old building is just the same.
As soon as I parked the car, an old neighbor came to me. We walked to the elevator together and he was soo looking forward to hear all my grand news. And guess what? I had nothing to say! I mean. He asked: did you get married? I was like WITH WHOM?... Oooh.. right! You're the one who wanted to persue career before anything... did you get an exciting job? Nope...I'm still in the same super small office I was when I left the building... I did finish school! Finally, with great grades! The principal of the career told me it was an honor to have me as an student and even said that if all students were like me my university would be HUGE.
Well, he didn't mind that. He was in shock because I'm still single (thanks God he didn't ask me if I had a bf, could you imagine. "Nope, still single, still alone").
Other than that, it was nice to go there. The doorman was soooo happy to see me, (this is the first time I see him since I moved out because the other times I went there he was in his days off). He ran to me and hugged me, kissed me and started asking me how I was doing, before anything he asked me about my family and all that. It was SUPER nice to see him.
After I left the building I didn't want to come back to the office (yeah, I had to come) so I decided to drive around to see how things changed... a few strees are as good as new. Others still have the same problems than 2 years ago.
The neighborhood didn't change much. Just enough to let me know it's not home anymore. It was a weird feeling.
But I guess that it'd be selfish to ask to feel at home there when I feel perfectly at home in my new neightborhood, right?
Saavedra will always be my first home and that is something no neightbodhood can change 
LOL, it feels like I'm talking about my first big love, right? LOL...
Better go back to work
See ya around,
S. |
posted Thursday April 5th, @12:59PM
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