just testing - slapyacausiknowya - Journals

There is nothing so self-evident as my unflagging inability to construct even the simplest sentence, and there seems little to do about it except to not write at all. Which brings out the paradox that I would not be writing because I was not writing. Living beyond irony is most probably a place not less populated so much as less discerned. I mean, who bothers to consider their state of existence, well, who has the time to bother. For me, the wife and family are off at the Mother-in-law's house, she has just had something done at the hospital. I would tell you about it, but the topic is both boring and against the law.

So the other day, the kids, who happen to be 9 and 12, were making fun of what they considered, my sad sense of humor. You don't know, but I will tell you that I cannot, could not, tell a joke to save either of our lives, nevertheless, I can be funny, very funny, dizzily funny, slap-happy funny, and damnit I was offended at the mere suggestion of my unfunniness. When you cannot tell jokes and you make an effort to instill humor it comes with great personal sacrifice as you simply must, at times, have a great laugh upon yourself. Anyway, so I tell the little shavers of my unhappiness at their harsh assessment, after all, it was not that long ago that both of them believed six was afraid of seven, because seven eight nine. They may have been a tough crowd, but that is a bit of verbiage capable of settling down any young critic.

So how have you been? Last time we saw each other you were involved with, uh, what was her name? That's right, Candy, as in Candy Kane. Yes, so is she still... Yes, good, I have seen her, I mean not naked, but in the club with you, remember? No, never been back, but now don't be jealous, but isn't she, well, isn't she a bit hot for you? Not that I mean you aren't good enough for her, but that it is rather hard to date someone whose nakedness is sort of a popular craze. Yes, that is true, we all did start out that way. No, I don't think it is a big deal, not really. I mean is really is quite against the grain for a priest these days. I am certain the Pope is very proud of you. I understand the excommunication folder has a glossy of Candy in it. Well good luck with all that, I have to get back my journal now. See you later, all my love to Candy and the Pope.

What an inspiring man, wow.

Anyway, like I was saying, sentence construction and spelling are my worse capabilities. One good thing to come out of this is my incredible ability to find that backspace key without looking at the keys. A very useful quality that I would instantly trade for another...

posted Thursday October 25th, @09:40PM

Friday September 7th
(jump earlier later)

just testing - slapyacausiknowya

boogerbutt cam e down th e stairs to se e what I was doing in th e basement. Littl e punk better mind his manners today and not shit on my stuff. It was a beautiful day yesterday when burgerbutt took his crap on som e of the styrofoam cups that had been knocked over weeks ago and not picked up. Tell you what, it is had to get pissed off about some crap, when that crap is perfectly laid on a cup laying on it's sid e. Hard to be pissed off and amazed at th e sam e tim e.

Anyway, the laundry is still needing to b e don e, and I can't seem to get to it caus e this internet interferes. It god damn bugs m e that wusha, wusha, groan, groan, wusha, th e machin e makes. Anyway, ther e was boogerbutt staring at m e with his big brown eyes. He is so cut e, I remember the day w e went to th e jigboat races and h e had everyon e so distracted they missed seeing who won the rac e. Boogerbutt just sucked all this up and sat still, allowing his adoring fans to run their hands through his brown hair.

Ther e I was, proudly holding boogerbutt in my arms when suddenly I realized the laundry needed to be don e, but it was too lat e. As was my MO, I daydreamed my time away and I needed clean underwear. Yet again, I would need to dampwash my undies and suffer through promise of potential chafing for a coupl e of hours. I hate doing that to myself and promised to change th e order of things around her e starting now. This tim e I meant it.

While I washed my undies, boogerbutt just sat staring at m e, as if h e had no idea what I was doing and wanted to learn.

posted Friday September 7th, @11:47AM

Tuesday, 29-May 04:15:07

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