 Rogue WolfAte Your Homework, And Framed The Dog
join:2003-08-12
Troy, NY | Do Your Part! Dear cash cow consumer,
Please remember that the Internet is vital to the security and financial success of this country, much like highways. And just like highways, the Internet functions much better if you stay off of it as much as possible. Copyright pirates want to clog up the Internet by downloading things they shouldn't! This could lead to the end of free commerce and our way of life, just like the terrorists want!
What can you, the total sucker conscientious consumer do to help? You can deny the copyright pirates their "fat pipes" by buying the highest-speed Internet connection possible. Just like on a highway, if you make your lane bigger, other lanes get smaller. You can also ensure that the "highway" stays clear by using your Internet connection only for vital purposes, such as checking your Email (no pictures, please; some pictures can take up billions and billions of bits!).
By doing your part, you, the open wallet valued consumer can help save the Internet, America, and freedom itself!
With patriotism and respect,
Your local Internet Service Provider
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I have learned to ignore such naysayers, when... quelling... them... hm?... was out of the question. |
