kasparov33
Premium
join:2007-05-04
Conover, NC
| reply to kasparov33
Re: Update on my son who has cancer
thanks for letting me know im not the only one who talks to the departed. its strange but watching spongebob last night was very comforting and probably one of the only times i have laughed since he died. a quick story before i go, several years ago i had taken a shower and decided to be silly to my wife so i took my sons recorder run into our bedroom with only underwear on and pretended i was playing the flute. my son came in right in the middle of this madness and looked straight at me and said "captain whistlefoot". dont know where that came from but from then on i am always known as captain whistlefoot. kids do come up with the silliest things. later all |
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Vtblues
if you can't get out of it, get in to it
Premium
join:2006-05-29
Brookfield, VT
clubs:   | reply to NY Tel
Why worry what others think when they do it so little? |
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NY Tel
Premium
join:2004-04-09
Smithtown, NY
 ·VOIPo
| said by Vtblues  :Why worry what others think when they do it so little? lol - I don't want to preach but I am a firm believer in the IDGARA Society in fact I am the President of the New York Chapter.
Stands for I Don't Give A Rats Ass Society which means I really don't care what others think so I am in total agreement but let's not derail the OP's topic....I'm totally cool.  |
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jwersan
R.I.P. Mom, Brian, Ziggy, and Max.
Premium
join:2004-12-20
Port Jefferson Station, NY
clubs:
 ·Optimum Online
| said by NY Tel :I am in total agreement but let's not derail the OP's topic....I'm totally cool. I agree, but I want to add this little tidbit, as further proof.
This past Wednesday we had to put our VERY elderly cat to sleep. He was a favorite of everyone in my family, especially my recently departed mother.
When my wife, who was agonising over the decision to call the vet about Ziggy, picked up the phone, her hand slipped and she hit several buttons, when she looked at the display on the phone, my mother's name was on it!
She took that as my mother telling her it was time to let Ziggy go. 
Your son will "visit" you as often as he can, and you will know it when it happens, for all you know, he was sitting next to you on the couch when you were watching Spongebob!
--
RIAA/MPAA... Bite me!!!!
Death Penalty for parking violations!
In constant search for intelligent life on Earth! |
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jozy123
Premium
join:2004-12-21
Tucson, AZ | reply to kasparov33
Peace to you, Captain Whistlefoot. |
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kasparov33
Premium
join:2007-05-04
Conover, NC
| reply to kasparov33
well today is that special day. i am going to take my wife somewhere tonight and thank her for not giving up on me a long time ago. its nice to think she kept after me. i have been blessed with a good wife a wonderful son and a great daughter. have a happy valentines day all. love em while you can. |
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Santa Fe
I think therefore I Fold.
Premium,ExMod 2002-7
join:2000-08-22
Freight Yard
clubs:
·Mediacom
| said by kasparov33 :well today is that special day. i am going to take my wife somewhere tonight and thank her for not giving up on me a long time ago. its nice to think she kept after me. i have been blessed with a good wife a wonderful son and a great daughter. have a happy valentines day all. love em while you can. Well I hope all the best for you both, and may I say you are a real inspiration to us all! God bless you and yours!
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I'm Forever Folding For Team Helix |
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NY Tel
Premium
join:2004-04-09
Smithtown, NY
·VOIPo
1 edit | reply to kasparov33
Happy Valentines Day! |
Happy Valentines Day to you and your wife!
*Graphic plagiarized from lilhurricane |
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kasparov33
Premium
join:2007-05-04
Conover, NC | reply to kasparov33
thank you all. |
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kingpin317
Premium
join:2007-12-05
Pope, MS
| reply to kasparov33
Kasparov, I have been out of town and did not check boards, so I am so sorry to be getting to you at this late date, but I wanted you to know that my wife and I are praying for you and your wife, and we are deeply saddened to hear about your son's passing. We have a son, and it broke our hearts to read this. We know that he will always be with you, and one day, you'll see him again. We truly believe in that promise. Take care of each other, and know that you are never alone in your grief.
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HN 7000S ProPlus/89W/1270MHz/Sig 63/1Watt/.74 m/Rate 256K 2/3(TC)/1A8/16TR/ |
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AquaSport
California - Sun, Surf, Traffic Jams
join:2007-05-03
California
·Comcast
| reply to kasparov33
Kasparov,
a family loss is difficult, but during tough moments, remember who you have near you for comfort, and then remember your son, and the love you have for him, and hopefully that will help you cope.
All my condolences are sent to you.
I hope you do cope well, and think of happy times you had with your son, and share them with your family.
My upmost sympathy,
Brendan
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Out with the old, in with the Antique! |
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Skand
join:2001-06-01
Corpus Christi, TX
clubs: | reply to kasparov33
Wow... just wow. Just read this for the first time and it truly brought tears to my eyes.
Kasparov, you will be in my prayers. Stay strong!
I hope that I never have to bury one of my children... |
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stickfigure
join:2002-06-11
El Cajon, CA | reply to kasparov33
kasparov, just came across this, and had both my wife and I in tears. Best wishes to you and your family. Please let us know if there's anything we can do. |
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Chris 313
Come get some
Premium
join:2004-07-18
Houma, LA
clubs:
·Comcast
·Comcast
·Charter Pipeline
·Comcast Digital Vo..
·AT&T CallVantage
| reply to kasparov33
said by kasparov33 :thank you all. I just came across this again and I'm very sorry to hear the news, but am glad to see you and your wife are pushing on. Now the healing can begin and the memories of happy times will adhere to your brain. |
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Serbtastic
You Know How Many People I Have Buried?
Premium
join:2002-02-24
Stoney Creek
| reply to kasparov33
I just finished reading this and have to admit I'm sitting here all alone in my home office crying like a baby.
I am so sorry for your loss. I keep thinking how I'd feel if I lost my son. He is my light and my life.
God bless you and keep you and your family. Keep your son close in your prayers and your thoughts. |
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our sons
@birch.net
 from:
kasparov33
| reply to kasparov33
Re: Update on my son who has cancer
you dont know me but I also lost my son to cancer on Jan 5, 2008 at the age of 14. Like you it is the worst thing I could have imagined. Every day.....the sadness, pain. I wish you well my friend. But we are changed forever. |
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kasparov33
Premium
join:2007-05-04
Conover, NC
| reply to kasparov33
things are very different. even as adults we still dont know how to understand death. i hope that you to are ok. i am so sorry to hear that you lost your son this year too. i am 37 years old and have seen death in my family before and you know that eventually it will come for you but to have to see one of your children die before you just isnt right. i have asked my self the same question so many times. why did my son have to die when there are so many other vile and terrible people who do a lot of bad and terrible things and they are still walking the earth. but thats a question that will never be answered. it has been 3 weeks and i still sometimes expect my son to get up and play some xbox or watch a movie with me. i wish we could go fishing again. we used to go fishing a lot at a friends house. it is very quiet there and not a lot of boats to come and go. he loved that place very much and we would talk about a lot of things when we were there. i remember the last time we went fishing was on a wednesday before we learned that he had cancer. we only caught 2 small fish. but mike had a wonderful time and he put his feet in the water as we were sitting on the dock and he said he had as much fun doing that and just being there with me as he did catching a big fish. i need to go now because this is very emotional but hope you all have a great day and give your children a hug and kiss for me. thanks. |
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Timsdad
@charter.com
| reply to kasparov33
I have kept up with the post and thought I would say hello again.
I am sad to see that another family "our sons" has joined our club that no parent ever wants to belong to. We have just went through the 5th year anniversary of loosing our son. It is still extremely hard.
We have a friend that lost a son before we lost ours. I talked with her and told her I was sorry for her loss and thought I was being sincere but I did not have a clue how deep the loss and pain was until I went through it. I went back to her and apologized and told her I should have been there for her. I understood that you can't just get over it and go on with your life.
My wife and I have not been nor will ever be the same again. We still ask why it happened and know we will take this pain with us until our time comes to join our son.
You may find that some of your friends become uncomfortable around you because they don't understand why you can't just get over it and you hope they never know the pain and empty hole in your soul that will never be filled.
As I said in my other post, there are so many things I could say about the feelings you will be going through as time passes. Just understand all the feelings and doubts that you have are normal and you are not alone. There are a lot of us that strive to go on with our lives, one day at a time.
Our prayers are with you...
Mike
Tim's Dad |
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Warzau
Premium
join:2000-10-26
Naperville, IL
clubs:
| reply to kasparov33
I thought I would chime in again. Have you and your wife sought counseling? I hope you do, I know you have this thread as a source to vent. But sometimes it's best to talk to a professional. When my Mom and Dad lost their first son, they never sought helped, then again this was nearly 40 years ago. My mother always blamed herself and my father never speaks about it. My mother eventually ( 10 years ) ago sought help because of her deteriorating mental health. She has come to grips that it wasn't her fault and other thing in her life wasn't her fault as well.
She of course never forgets, every year she celebrate his birth and mourns in her way his death. 2 years ago she went back to her country to visit his grave, something she found hard to do. Unfortunately my Dad never sought help and he doesn't speak of it. Sometimes I wonder about him. |
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