Wednesday July 30th
(jump earlier)
And now for something completely different
Getting prepared to be married is supposed to be a giant headache, but I have to say for us it's gone very smoothly. Hopefully this is good portent for our future together. We go out to CA to get the marriage license in September, and then we get married on November 9th out there.
I looked into getting a second job recently, doing something that I thought I'd never do again... working for a private ambulance service. As of a couple of weeks from now, I'm likely going to be working 16 hours every Saturday. Not my ideal, but it pays much better than retail, and I don't really have a choice financially. Plus I'll get my continuing-education hours paid for so that I can renew my license at the end of the year. |
posted Wednesday July 30th, @11:53AM
Saturday July 12th
(jump earlier later)
Part of the market
If I didn't have almost no money, I'd be more worried about the economy. As it is, however, and as I'm sure is the case for people in my situation, I can't help but look at all the hoopla surrounding the downturn in stocks, etc, and see it as a problem that I'd like to have. I hardly have anything in savings, let alone having the luxury of having enough to buy stocks that might have decreased in value a little bit.
There are people with much worse problems than we have... I used to treat them as an urban EMT, so I'm familiar with it on a personal level. I have a harder time with people who have so much more than we do and still complain that it isn't enough. So your stocks went down, big deal. Try having almost nothing left by your next paycheck, every time, despite being careful.
I personally just wish that I had enough to save a little, maybe, so that if I do lose my job I won't be out on the street. |
posted Saturday July 12th, @09:24AM
Friday June 13th
(jump earlier later)
We're on a road to nowhere...
I'm the only person working right now, as Ash hasn't been able to find a job in over a year. You'd think that two people on one salary would be manageable if you just budget carefully, but the reality is that you can only cut back so much before you stop having the basic necessities. We've hit that point now... prior to my last paycheck, I had very little money left in my account and bills still yet to be paid.
We remain optimistic, and try to enjoy life, but there's always this nagging feeling of impending catastrophe, like what you have might go away if one thing goes wrong. Charlie (dog) chewed up a safety razor last week... it cost over $300 to find out that he hadn't swallowed any of the blades. One or two things like that will seriously mess things up financially... how are we supposed to be ready for the unexpected when we can barely make our base expenses? |
posted Friday June 13th, @07:28PM
Saturday June 7th
(jump earlier later)
Heat wave
Today was a long day. I was awoken at 7 am (after going to bed at 1 am... we were watching a movie) because Ash had to get to a meeting about 45 min away from our house and had almost forgotten about it. Our dog whizzed in his crate overnight (he still does that from time to time), so our living room reeked of dog urine (and still does... hard to get rid of the smell).
My brother came into town from Brooklyn, spent the day with him for the most part while Ash was in her meeting... which ended abruptly far earlier than expected. I had to drop my brother off with my folks, and then drive for an hour and a half to get her. I think it's safe to say that I don't want to see the backside of a windshield for a while.
Having weekends off is nice, compared to my old schedule, when I worked 4 days on and then 2 off on a rotating basis. Everyone else being off at the same time as you is a nice feeling, makes you feel like more of a part of society than wandering around doing errands on a Tuesday at 11 am used to. I'm starting to wonder whether or not the flip side of this will eventually catch up to me, however. Most of the world seems to hate the week-in, week-out routine. To me, it's a blessing just to know when I will be able to spend time with Ash and my dog Charlie. |
posted Saturday June 7th, @08:00PM
Friday June 6th
(jump earlier later)
The Best of Both Worlds
Having worked in public safety for almost 8 years, I saw a fair amount of humanity, good and bad. Then I met Ashley, my fiance, and realized that working odd hours, on odd days, and dealing with my daily work wouldn't be conducive to having a family, or anything resembling a normal life.
Many of the people that I know who work in the field find that walking the line between being the person who's there for everyone (it is, after all, your job) and being the person who needs their own time is an incredibly fine one. Some of the things that we deal with, well, it's hard *not* to let it affect you while still remaining human.
The best that many of us could do was to find a way to push it aside within us, deal with it, and move on. What I realized was that, no matter how good you are at doing that, it builds... slowly, like a river coming over its banks, and like a river, you may not notice it until it's near the crest.
Now, I work with Sarah  on a magazine that's well-known for what it does, and well-respected. The shift to working 9-5, Monday through Friday has left me with some conflicted feelings. Have I abandoned a calling to work a more normal schedule, and in doing so, betrayed those whom I was supposed to help? Does this work count as helping people in a different way? Or am I supposed to still find a way to play the role of responder to the emergencies of others?
I think that those of us who have worked in the field of emergencies (large and small) find that it becomes ingrained into our personalities, where part of our identity is to be the helper. We tie our value to how well we do at being that role. When we step into the other world of those who do not have that responsibility (a distinction very clearly made among our ranks... "civilian" versus responder), there has to be some kind of a substitute, one that I haven't found yet.
Soon, I will go to a reserve Police Academy to become a sworn volunteer officer for a local town. Even now, I know that it will be different. I'm hoping that it might be enough. |
posted Friday June 6th, @06:55PM
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onehuman