wonko3fc
Verbum sat sapienti
join:2001-06-02
UK
 ·BT Broadband
| [Joke] aww, the irish........
Paddy & Mick go to London to donate sperm. It was a disaster! Paddy missed the tube & Mick came on the bus!!
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Paddy calls Easyjet to book a flight. The operator asks 'How many people are flying with you?'
Paddy replies 'I don't know! Its your f***ing plane!!'
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Two Irish couples decided to swap partners for the night. After 3 hours of amazing sex Paddy says 'I wonder how the girls are getting on'
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Paddy takes his new wife to bed on their wedding night. She undresses & lies on the bed spread-eagled & says 'You know what I want don't you?'
'Yeah,' says Paddy. 'The whole friggin bed by the looks of it!'
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Q. What's a Catholic priest & a pint of Guiness got in common?
A. black coat, white collar & you've got to watch your arse if you get a dodgy one!
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Paddy the electrician got sacked from the U.S. prison service for not servicing the electric chair. He said in his professional opinion it was a death trap!
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Paddy's chat up lines:
1. Did ya fart? 'Cos ya just blew me away!
2. Are your parents retarded? 'Cos your special!
3. My love for you is like diarrhoea. I just cant hold it in!
4. Is there a mirror in your knickers? 'Cos I can see myself in them!
5. Your body reminds me of a spanner. Evertime I think of you my nuts tighten up!
6. You might not be the best looking girl in here, but beauty is only a light switch away!
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An Irishman is sh @ gging a Jewish girl & says 'You're not very tight for a Jew!'
She says 'Well you're not very thick for a Paddy!'
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Paddy is said to be shocked at finding out all his cows have Bluetongue. 'Be Jeysus!' he said, 'I didn't even know they had mobile phones!'
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Mick & Paddy are reading head stones at a nearby cemetery. Mick say 'Crikey! There's a bloke here who was 152!'
Paddy says 'What's his name?'
Mick replies 'Miles, from London !'
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An Irishman is rowing his boat in a field of hay. Paddy drives past & stops. He looks at the Irishman in the boat & shouts 'Its thick c**ts like you that give us Irish a bad name! I'd come over there & kick the f**k out of you if I could swim!' |
