| Answers to your questions from the RIAA If you'll excuse me for a moment, I'm going to channel the RIAA and answer the questions that the article asked.
{BEGIN RIAA CHANNELING}
Can unreliable RIAA DMCA violation data can be trusted?
Of course. We only hire the best in unaccountable shadow companies. When we accuse someone of copyright infringement, they are guilty of copyright infringement because we've accused them of copyright infringement.
How do users defend themselves?
Easy. Just pay us money and they won't need to defend themselves. In other words: "That's a nice house you have there. It'd be a shame if *someone* sued you into bankruptcy and you had to give it up."
Impact on small carriers?
The small carriers will survive. And by survive, we mean be gobbled up by the large carriers when they go out of business thanks to us driving up the costs of doing business just to prop up our failing business model.
Who keeps track?
This is still in the planning stages. One option is for us to track it. All the ISPs need to do is give us access to the personal information of all users as we demand it. That's not so much to ask, is it?
Does the punishment fit the crime?
Remember when Jack Valenti compared copying a movie on VHS to Jack the Ripper? Well, copying a song via P2P is the equivalent of bombing Pearl Harbor. If we could send Internet pirates to gitmo, we would. (That deal fell through.)
Aren't there more creative solutions?
Us? Creative? *muffled sounds of tons of RIAA executives laughing hysterically* We'll (*giggle*) look into that.
Who Pays?
There's an easy way to see who will pay for this. First, find yourself a mirror. Next, look into it. That's who will pay.
I hope this has cleared things up.
{END RIAA CHANNELING}
Note to self: Too much channeling of RIAA thinking can be damaging to your moral compass.
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-Jason Levine
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