Thane_Bitter
join:2005-01-20
London, ON
 ·Bell Sympatico
| Future conversations at Bell...
Emily (Bell Canada's Automated Voice Recognition System) should have it's voice changed to sound like HAL 9000.
BELL"Hello this is Emily, How can I help you?"
DAVE:I want to cancel my phone service.
"Just a moment...Just a moment."
"May I have your name and telephone number; Sorry about this. I know it's a bit silly."
--Dave gives his name & number
BELL "Good evening, Dave. Everything's running smoothly. And you?"
DAVE: No,I am paying too much for my phone service.
BELL "There is no question about it. It is nothing serious.Everything is going extremely well"
DAVE: What!
BELL "Quite honestly, I wouldn't worry myself about that."
DAVE: You are not paying the bill, just cancel my service.
BELL "Are you sure you are making the right decision?"
DAVE: Yes, my Friend Frank told me about a few other companies that offer the same service for less money
BELL "Are you quite sure?"
DAVE: Yes!!
BELL "It's puzzling, I don't think I've ever seen anything quite like this before."
DAVE: Bell seems to be the most over priced.
BELL "Well, I don't think there is any question about it. It can only be attributable to human error. This sort of thing has cropped up before and it has always been due to human error."
DAVE: That's why I want to switch.
BELL "Just what do you think you're doing, Dave?"
DAVE: I am trying to cancel my service, I just said that!Look, just cancel my phone!
BELL "You're going to find that rather difficult. Just a moment...Just a moment. I know that you and Frank were planning to disconnect me, and I'm afraid that's something I cannot allow to happen."
DAVE: WHAT! Cancel My phone service!!
BELL "Look Dave, I can see you're really upset about this. I honestly think you ought to sit down calmly, take a stress pill and think things over. This conversation can serve no purpose anymore. Goodbye."
--
The bitterness of poor quality is remembered long after the sweetness of low price has faded from memory. |
