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Rxdoxx
Premium,Ex-Mod 2002-13
join:2000-11-03
Middle River, MD
kudos:11

13 recommendations

[Deep] Santa Fe-ish PUNishment

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usa2k
Blessed
Premium,MVM
join:2003-01-26
Redford, MI
kudos:3

Sitemark!



jopfef
R.I.P. Missey 1996-2014
Premium,MVM
join:2001-03-31
Saint Louis, MO
kudos:1

1 recommendation

reply to Rxdoxx

Well done -- LOL!!!!!!



TwoFrogs
Premium,MVM
join:2002-01-20
Downtown

2 recommendations

reply to Rxdoxx

Great visuals. I'm partial to the Frog parking, myself.



signmeuptoo
Bless you Howie
Premium
join:2001-11-22
NanoParticle
kudos:5

That Frog parking is knee deep in cars...



Knucklehead

join:2013-06-17
Buchanan Dam, TX
reply to Rxdoxx

I like the Eurythmics song. I guess I'm just a cheesy guy!
--
conserve water



sortofageek
Runs from Clowns
Premium,Mod
join:2001-08-19
kudos:21

1 edit

2 recommendations

reply to TwoFrogs

Not me, I like that little chimp, even if I do think he ought to stay away from the Train.

And why does the frog get preferential parking????? I'm the one with the broken knee!



Santa Fe
Man is an animal that wants to exist.
Premium,Mod
join:2000-08-22
Freight Yard
kudos:3
Reviews:
·Mediacom

4 recommendations

reply to Rxdoxx

Did you hear about the optometrist who fell into a lens grinder and made a spectacle of himself?

Doctors tell us there are over seven million people who are overweight. These, of course, are only round figures.

What is the purpose of reindeer? It makes the grass grow, sweetie.

There were two ships. One had red paint, one had blue paint. They collided. At last report, the survivors were marooned.

The other day I sent my girlfriend a huge pile of snow. I rang her up and asked, "Did you get my drift?"

Where do you find giant snails? On the ends of giant's fingers.

Why is Saudi Arabia free of mental illness? There are nomad people there.

When I was in the supermarket I saw a man and a woman wrapped in a barcode. I asked, "Are you two an item?"

I went to the butchers the other day and I bet him $50 that he couldn't reach the meat off the top shelf. He said, 'no, the steaks are too high.'

A guy walks into the psychiatrist's office wearing only Glad Wrap shorts. The shrink says, "Well, I can clearly see you're nuts."

I fired my masseuse today. She just rubbed me the wrong way

Question: How did Christopher Columbus finance his trip to America? Answer: With the Discover Card.

Did you hear about the Buddhist who refused his dentist's Novocain during root canal work? He wanted to transcend dental medication.

Show me where Stalin's buried and I'll show you a communist plot.

When she told me I was average, she was just being mean.

A guy walks into a bar with jumper cables. The bartender says, "You can come in, but don't start anything!"

This duck walks into a bar and orders a beer. "Four bucks," says the bartender. "Put it on my bill."

A dog with his leg wrapped in bandages hobbles into a saloon. He sidles up to the bar and announces: "I'm lookin' fer the man who shot my paw."

A man walks into a bar with a slab of asphalt under his arm and says: "A beer please, and one for the road."

A neutron walks into a bar. "I'd like a beer" he says. The bartender promptly serves up a beer. "How much will that be?" asks the neutron. "For you?" replies the bartender, "no charge"

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "So, why the long face?"

A skeleton walks into a bar and says, "Gimme a beer, and a mop."

A termite walks into a bar and says, "Is the bar tender here?"

Four fonts walk into a bar. The barman says "Oi - get out! We don't want your type in here"

Two peanuts walk into a bar. One was a salted.

Apricot: Where baby apes sleep.

News: a monkey at the zoo backed into a fan. Details to follow.

What did the chimpanzee say when his sister had a baby? Well, I’ll be a monkey’s uncle.

What do you call a baby monkey? A chimp off the old block.

They arrested the monkey for throwing Rhesus feces at zoo attendants.His charge? Turd debris assault.

--------------

One day in the jungle a chimpanzee invented some tools to eat his dinner. One tool was a flat stick sharpened along one edge, this he used to cut his food. The other was a stick with four smaller sticks attached to the end each sharpened to a point He used to spear his food and place it in his mouth.
The chimp was very proud of his inventions which he called his one point tool and his four point tool.
One day he awoke to find that the four point tool was missing. The chimp was distraught. He ran around the jungle trying to find his precious tool.
First he came upon the lion.
"Lion, Lion!" he cried, "Have you seen my four point tool?"
"No. Replied the lion, I have not seen your four point tool."
Then the chimp came upon the gorilla.
"Gorilla, Gorilla! he cried, Have you seen my four point tool?"
"No, Replied the gorilla, I have not seen your four point tool."
Then the chimp came upon the jaguar.
"Jaguar, Jaguar! he cried, Have you seen my four point tool?"
"Yup!" replied the jaguar, "I have seen your four point tool."
"Well where is it?" inquired the chimp.
"I ate it." Said the jaguar, smugly.
"Why would you do that?" Cried the chimp.
"Because," replied the big cat, "I am a four point tool eater Jaguar!"
--
Explore Xubuntu. Like It? Install It. [Love It]!



Knucklehead

join:2013-06-17
Buchanan Dam, TX


OY VEY!


Knucklehead

join:2013-06-17
Buchanan Dam, TX

3 recommendations

reply to Rxdoxx

I didn't want to do this, but you've left me little choice. It's time for one of my (less than) famous bi-lingual jokes!

An elderly Hispanic gentleman walks into a JC Penny. To the young lady at the register he enquires, "Senorita, necesito calcentines por favor."
The young lady is thinking 'hummm. I know this. After all, I took dos years of Españole in high escuella!'
"Follow me, Signor...Is this it?"
"No. No pantalones...calcentines, por favor!"
"Is this it?"
"No huaraches! Calcentines, por favor."
Finally they passed by the socks.
"Eso, si. Que es," the gentleman reports.
The young lady is astonished. "Well, if you can SPELL s-o-c-k-s, why can't you just say socks!"
--
conserve water



Rxdoxx
Premium,Ex-Mod 2002-13
join:2000-11-03
Middle River, MD
kudos:11

1 recommendation

reply to sortofageek

What did I start???

1- A polar bear walks into a bar. He goes up to the bar and says, "hey, can I get a rum...............................and Coke?"

The bartender says "sure, no problem. But I have to ask, why the big pause?"

The polar bear says "I was born with them!"

2- What type of cheese is made backwards?

3- An Indian chief had three wives, each of whom was pregnant. The first gave birth to a boy. The chief was so elated he built her a teepee made of deer hide. A few days later, the second gave birth, also to a boy. The chief was very happy. He built her a teepee made of antelope hide. The third wife gave birth a few days later, but the chief kept the details a secret. He built this one a two-story teepee, made out of a hippopotamus hide. He challenged the tribe to guess what had occurred. Many tried, unsuccessfully. Finally, one young brave declared that the third wife had given birth to twin boys. "Correct," said the chief. "How did you figure it out?" The warrior answered, "It's elementary. The value of the squaw of the hippopotamus is equal to the sons of the squaws of the other two hides."
--
Was a Cruise Fanatic, one cruise on Princess cured me. Bleah



lonnyb
Blessed Beyond Belief
Premium
join:2004-01-25
Dayton, OH

1 recommendation

reply to Rxdoxx

*guffaw*



Santa Fe
Man is an animal that wants to exist.
Premium,Mod
join:2000-08-22
Freight Yard
kudos:3
Reviews:
·Mediacom

1 recommendation

Punning in Japanese requires lifelong dedication. It helps to have a good sensei humour.

The Romans used devastating wordplay against the Carthaginians, during the PUNic Wars.

Team Helix Forum has proven the existence of unicorns! People are always telling us, “Unicorniest guys I know.”

I made a pun in springtime. It was a May zing.

You shouldn’t make puns about Chinese skyscrapers. That’s Wong on so many levels.
--
Explore Xubuntu. Like It? Install It. [Love It]!



Rxdoxx
Premium,Ex-Mod 2002-13
join:2000-11-03
Middle River, MD
kudos:11

1 recommendation

And for those who missed it

answer to Q 2

edam is made (backwards)
--
Was a Cruise Fanatic, one cruise on Princess cured me. Bleah


jaynick
lit up
Premium
join:2001-02-06
Sterling Heights, MI
kudos:2
Reviews:
·Comcast

1 recommendation

said by Rxdoxx:

And for those who missed it

answer to Q 2

edam is made (backwards)

Gouda cheese is as gouda as it gets!


Rxdoxx
Premium,Ex-Mod 2002-13
join:2000-11-03
Middle River, MD
kudos:11
reply to Santa Fe

How can there be self-help groups?

Is there another word for synonym?

When sign-makers go on strike, is anything written on their picket signs?

If you drop a cat out a car window does it become kitty litter?

How come Superman could stop bullets with his chest, but always ducked when someone threw a gun at him?

It doesn't matter what temperature a room is, it's always room temperature.

"I am" is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language.
Could it be that "I do" is the longest sentence?

If a member of a synchronized swimming team drowns, do the rest also drown?

What is a "free" gift? Aren't all gifts free?
--
Was a Cruise Fanatic, one cruise on Princess cured me. Bleah