I have to hand it to you stimulation, you are honest with yourself.
You make me smile and frustrate me at the same time. I raised two sons and a daughter. I think understand you. I could be wrong, but I have you pegged as a young man who knows what he wants and isn't about to let anyone get in his way. When I was your age, I was much the same. Now I am an old man and I just don't hardly give a &$^t, but that is my problem.
If you have a problem (and we all do) it is that you are so confident in your abilities that you fail to realize that every persons efforts are built largely upon the efforts of people who came before them. That antenna design is just something that was generated from the studies that other people did to explain how parabolic antennas worked. The genius was Maxwel and Morse and not even the people that wrote the information on how parabolics worked. The moron who drew a little curve on a piece of paper and told you, "make it this way" only told you that because someone else told him that. On the other hand, that moron, did read a few thousand pages of documentation about antennas to get to the point where he could begin (begin mind you) to understand what is happening with that funny little curve. Here is a link to his personal web page:
Your problem, if you have one (and we all do), is that you think you can deviate from the learning process and jump straight into genius. You can't do that. You have to have mentors, tutors, and teachers. Sometimes they will bore you, most of mine did. But every now and then you will find one like my Calculus professor at University of Texas. That old fart came to class in overalls and a T-Shirt. He walked into the room on the first day and asked if anyone was interested in being able to figure out how much water was in a mud puddle... I was hooked. Bottom line is when you find someone who doesn't bore you, LISTEN to them. Most of us old folks don't like repeating ourselves, we figure if you make us do that you don't respect our opinion. Why would we bother? It frustrates us and bores you.
Your first design was a corner reflector. Now if you find the spot between the arms of that corner reflector where the dipole is precisely 1.25 inchs from the very corner and dead center of the arms, you'll have a pretty good reflector. So you see your first effort wasn't really bad, you just didn't know how to use it. Make the arms longer and it works better. Here's a link to a similar (but smaller) design of my own. Look at the "minicorner":
»osiris.urbanna.net/antenna_desig ··· dex.html
Well, while I have you, let me tell you about evesdropping because that is what a keylogger is... I spent a good part of my life evesdropping, it was my job you see. It feels really powerfull to know things about people that they don't know you know, but in the end it can make you very sad. There are things which you REALLY don't want to know. A President once said, "Gentlemen do not read each other's mail." In the context in which he said it, he was being naieve. Gentlemen don't, but nations do.
Here is the best piece of advice I can give you, something that will help you the rest of your life, but you are going to think it is stupid. So just mark it down and think of it from time to time, my father used to say it to me after he got back from Viet-Nam (the second time), "While the apple is on the tree it grows and becomes sweeter, when it decides it is ripe, it falls from the tree and begins to rot." It took me a long time to figure that one out.
Peace little brother.