I am breathing slowly. I am trying not to be angry. Baby, do you know how much I spent for it? Its resale was a bit more than 20 gold, just a bit more. I might have to hunt some goblins down. We will not be taking the chopper to Westfall tonight. Instead you will be riding me. Those better be one hell of a pair of boots.
Slight change in plans, I am picking up a lot of booze on the way home.
Good idea - lots of booze. That will help. Then I'll help you hunt down those cheating little bastards. I remember what they looked like - green, and ugly. Big nose. One wore some black pants. We'll find them together, me and you - just like old times - I'll put up the glyph of fear, keep them in place while you rip 'em apart, get the keys back for the chopper. But I'm keeping the boots.
Oh you dirty dog. I waited up all night for you. Was ready to stand by your side, take on those goblins. We had a chance to make things right, and what do you do? YOU GOT DRUNK AND WHERE THE HELL WERE YOU ALL NIGHT?
I searched the Inn. I searched the docks. I even searched the barns, thinking maybe one of the Elekks caught your eye again. But no.
I have never been so humiliated - I had found a red mageweave set on the AH - it was a bargain - and I got it just for you. Got it from the mailbox, sent the boys over to my mother's house for the night and - I laid on the kitchen table all night waiting for you to come home and "find" me there, hoping you might want a late dinner. BUT NOOOOOOO. You had to stop and drink somewhere.
You can beg all you want now, it's too late. You have straw in your hair, and what's that on your pants!?!?!
I suppose I need to explain. I flew to Kharanos to get that Dwarf stout you always like. They had just had a celebration so they were all out of it. All of it. The last few kegs went to the king in Iron Forge so there was no way to get my hands on any. Especially after my last visit there where I got drunk, slapped the queen and pissed on the auctioneer's podium while dancing on it with a gnome. It was a few years ago but I never apologized for it.
Anyway, I decided to fly to Booty Bay and see if I can muster up some of that rum that got us arrested that one time. The one where you gave a lap dance to that monk and he didn't/couldn't say anything about it. The one that made you breath fire and me fart fire. I got a lead on some right outside of town by some traveling trolls. When I got there I was robbed. They had me lick a frog ads part of the deal. I woke up a few hours later with my head pounding and a strange taste in my mouth... It was the frog, I swear!. Also I had my coin purse missing along with my mount. I am sure my mount flew back to Stormwind. I had to walk all the way back to Booty Bay where I hopped a boat to Kalimdor. I was determined to still bring you home a treat and get my ind off of my bike.
I got to ratchet and wanted to fly to Theramore to quest for the mage lady for a few extra coin... we go way back. But I had no money and had to run. That is when I ran into Crossroads. I have never seen so many pissed off Orcs go after one Draenai. Without a mount I had to use Ghostwolf which they soon out ran. They caught me and did unimaginable things to my tail. One even tried to roast it. It was humiliating and scary. They took all my gear and threw me out of town.
I tried to continue traveling to Theramore when a small band of Blood Elves caught me. They did unspeakable things to me. And they were all men.I had no gear to defend myself and no money to pay them off. I was helpless. My butt still hurts. Thats what was on my pants by the way. All of those rumors about the male Blood Elves are all true, nasty little...
I finally arrived to Theramore early in the morning to find that the lady was not home and there would be no way to accomplish quests for her. However, one of the old mages saw that I had a rough night. When I told him my story, he chuckled, handed me a bottle of wine and opened a port back to home.
Ohhhhh! /pout Poor thing. You did all that for little ol' me? /coo
I am so sorry for ever thinking you were mucking around with the Elekks. I am so sorry I ever doubted you. You were right, I AM lucky.
Come here, let me take care of you. I bet you got some nasty kinks in your neck from all that - get the step ladder, I'll rub your neck. How are your shoulders, need some massaging there? Of course you do, you big stud. /coo Running all night, troll, orcs, and blood elves, oh my! Don't even think about going to work today, you need to rest up. That tail of yours needs to heal. Can you self cast, or should I run get some potions? At least you got a bottle of wine for all your troubles - I've heard that mage-pressed wine is the best in the lands. Let's share that bottle, help you forget all your troubles from last night. /coo I'm so sorry I yelled at you, how can I ever make it up to you?