  bistro777 Donuts-Is There Anything They Can't Do? Premium join:2002-02-07 Englewood, CO
| reply to Archivis Re: Save customers the pain and just send grenades
Dear SBC Subscriber:
Great news! Now you can bundle, rebundle and rerebundle all your communications needs! SBC is pleased to offer you in one convenient billing telephone, telegraph, teletype, television and telenet services in a package too confusing to break-down into its individual, component costs.
Rest assured, as we roll-out this exciting offering, that we will find new ways to bill you for everything from animated avatars to the number 3 (and letters d,e,f) on your telephone keypad. Also, please note with our TV product there will be a cap imposed on channel surfing. If you use your remote more than 2x/day, your TV signal will be limited to black-and-white images and reruns of Bewitched.
If you select to receive all of our services, we will award you a gold star. If you chose not to subscribe to 100% of our services, you will be penalized billed at a premium for your lack of support of SBC.
See you on Comedy Central!
Sincerely, All Your Friends at SBC
If we supported Etch-A-Sketch - -
Q: My Etch-A-Sketch has these funny lines all over the screen. A: Pick it up and shake it.
Q: My Etch-A-Sketch has a distorted display. A: Pick it up and shake it.
Q: My Etch-A-Sketch has squiggly lines that prevent me from doing my project. A: Pick it up and shake it.
Q: How do I turn off my Etch-A-Sketch? A: Pick it up and shake it. Put it down.
Q: Does my Etch-A-Sketch have a screen-saver? A: Pick it up and shake it. Keep shaking.
Q: How do I create a new document? A: Turn [right knob] and then [left knob]. (Reverse procedure if left-handed.)
Q: How do I delete a document from my Etch-A-Sketch? A: Pick it up and shake it.
Q: How do I keep from losing my Etch-A-Sketch document? A: Stop shaking it.
**Idiot users
** |