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Xstar_Lumini
join:2008-12-14
CANADA

Xstar_Lumini

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Being 40 Sucks Sometimes

Since turning 40 I feel like I'm in a twilight zone, sort of a black hole. I can't relate to the people in their 20's or to people over 50. I find that people over 50 are too boring for me, and younger than 30 are too foolish.

I was listening to a Toronto radio station that caters to 20-somethings, what was their topic? They were asking females who had slept with their boyfriends' Dads to call up and say who they enjoyed better in the sheets. What a disgusting culture of this age group, and what low IQ topics for them on the radio. I then listened to AM 640 and the D.J. (an annoying "boomer") was talking how people are weak nowadays, that when he was a teenager local cops would drag him to the station just for fun and beat him twice a week, and that he never complained or told his parents because he was "tough" back then. Dude you were a retard and a loser when you were a teenager, if cops would have done the same to me they wouldn't had been alive to do it next time. Nobody cares about your sado-masochist life in the 1960's.

This trend repeats in life in other areas too. We were invited to a BBQ at a park last weekend and while there I noticed that being 40 sucks even more. The crowd was made up of people in their late teens and early 20's and their parents in their 50's and 60's. All the mature men were playing dominos on a big table and others playing poker. I tried to join them thinking they were playing for money, they were playing for free. I told my wife; "Wow what a bunch of morons, playing dominos for fun, for free? On a sunny, hot day? Wasting time with no money involved?". I told my wife that I would never waste my life like this when I hit 60. Even at age 70 I will be mobile and active and do fun stuff. I wouldn't mind playing poker or checkers but it has to be with money, like I do with my friends in my house. Every Saturday night someone goes home with an extra $300 or $400 bucks, or leaves without it. Now that's fun.

I'm going to retire at age 55, which is more than a decade away, and when I do the first thing I'm going to buy is a brand new motorcycle, a SeaDoo, a trailer for my pick-up truck, and by that time my house in the tropics in a foreign country is going to be complete. I will tell you one thing though, I feel way more at home and comfortable with people in their 20's than with dinosaurs over 50. Don't get me wrong, one of my best friends is 56 but he still goes to nightclubs and plays soccer. If you are over 50 and don't play sports on a team or don't have a motorcycle or a Ski Doo, and you are going to spend your life playing dominos with other dinosaurs in a park bench, then you might as well visit Dr. Kevorkian and put your lights out.

urbanriot
Premium Member
join:2004-10-18
Canada

1 recommendation

urbanriot

Premium Member

said by Xstar_Lumini:

Since turning 40 I feel like I'm in a twilight zone, sort of a black hole. I can't relate to the people in their 20's or to people over 50. I find that people over 50 are too boring for me, and younger than 30 are too foolish.

Age is a state of mind.

The only thing I recall feeling when I hit my 40s was "oh, God, I'm in my forties..." which wasn't based on a tangible difference that one could articulate other than being categorized as something somehow different than what came before. Every decade is the same after 30, it only 'feels' different because everyone regards it with a negative connotation but it's really meaningless in the end.

The only major shift in life that I ever experienced was hitting my 30s, when we all settled down with families. You go for years without seeing good friends and people stop calling you on a Tuesday night to go out. Then you hit your 40s and it feels like the only time you're seeing anyone outside of family is when someone dies or gets married.
said by Xstar_Lumini:

If you are over 50 and don't play sports on a team or don't have a motorcycle or a Ski Doo, and you are going to spend your life playing dominos with other dinosaurs in a park bench, then you might as well visit Dr. Kevorkian and put your lights out.

Not exactly. Different strokes for different folks. I could name some things I've done in the past few years or in my life that I doubt anyone here has ever done and suggest you might as well visit Dr. Kevorkian but really it's something I like and others here might not be into.

I've been to some important music events in my life that some people would kill to attend. But some people aren't into music and don't care. I've traveled to some really cool places that you can't even go to today, due to wars or terrorism. But some people aren't into travelling. Hell, I've surfed in places that are dangerous because of wars and terrorism, but plenty of people aren't into surfing. Some people are into dominoes or checkers or chess with their peers. That's fine.

But you may have a good point in there, you just said it in all the wrong ways.

I do believe it's important to get out there and do something as you age, whether it's team oriented sports, motorcycling on a beautiful day through the country or along the water or through Africa, going on road trips, playing dominoes with friends at the park, learning to dance if you've never danced before, travel to a foreign country you've always wanted to see. It's never too late to backpack across Europe, I know someone who did it in their early 70's, stayed at hostels and all that.

Fergless
Premium Member
join:2008-04-19
Toronto, ON

7 recommendations

Fergless to Xstar_Lumini

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to Xstar_Lumini
If only we had a choice.

The shit hit the fan when I turned 50, operation after operation.
But I don't put down others ways of living, I deal with myself and those I love. Next month I'll be 77 ( thought I'd be dead long before that)

Life goes on eh..
bjlockie
join:2007-12-16
Ontario
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bjlockie to Xstar_Lumini

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to Xstar_Lumini
said by Xstar_Lumini:

I'm going to retire at age 55, which is more than a decade away, and when I do the first thing I'm going to buy is a brand new motorcycle, a SeaDoo, a trailer for my pick-up truck, and by that time my house in the tropics in a foreign country is going to be complete.

I wonder what percentage of the population will have that kind of money at 55.

urbanriot
Premium Member
join:2004-10-18
Canada

urbanriot

Premium Member

said by bjlockie:

said by Xstar_Lumini:

I'm going to retire at age 55, which is more than a decade away, and when I do the first thing I'm going to buy is a brand new motorcycle, a SeaDoo, a trailer for my pick-up truck, and by that time my house in the tropics in a foreign country is going to be complete.

I wonder what percentage of the population will have that kind of money at 55.

The majority. It doesn't have to cost much at all. You can buy these things used or get them for free and make them work in your spare time if you're a handy man.

I have a friend who when he was in his late 50's freely collected the parts to build an Indian motorcycle in his garage and over the course of a few years fully assembled it through the winter and on rainy summer days. The only parts he had to buy new were an oil filter, fuel pump, and some gaskets which cost him a couple hundred. So far the bike has taken him to one end of the country and back.

That's the problem with too many people today, they think in terms of new, new, new when people can buy plenty of things second hand at a bargain, either through buy & sell or at auctions.
taraf
join:2011-05-07
Ottawa, ON

taraf to bjlockie

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to bjlockie
said by bjlockie:

I wonder what percentage of the population will have that kind of money at 55.

Guess that depends on whether we figure out UBI by that point.

Personally, I'm going to hang on to at least 60... want to retire without a mortgage, plus the extra few years will make a big difference to my retirement income.
cfint
join:2014-01-20

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I'm not quite so old yet but I do get the ever increasing urge to yell at those damn kids these days.

LazMan
Premium Member
join:2003-03-26
Beverly Hills, CA

11 recommendations

LazMan to Xstar_Lumini

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to Xstar_Lumini
said by Xstar_Lumini:

Since turning 40 I feel like I'm in a twilight zone, sort of a black hole. I can't relate to the people in their 20's or to people over 50. I find that people over 50 are too boring for me, and younger than 30 are too foolish.

Most people relate to their peer group, so you aren't exactly special here, sunshine... People with a common frame of reference and experiences. 10 years older or younger is about the cap for most people in general.
said by Xstar_Lumini:

I then listened to AM 640 and the D.J. (an annoying "boomer") was talking how people are weak nowadays, that when he was a teenager local cops would drag him to the station just for fun and beat him twice a week, and that he never complained or told his parents because he was "tough" back then. Dude you were a retard and a loser when you were a teenager, if cops would have done the same to me they wouldn't had been alive to do it next time. Nobody cares about your sado-masochist life in the 1960's.

Do you even read the words that you type? You've bragged about kicking people in the face, having random teenage girls just appear on your couch, and now you're saying you're so bad-ass that as a teen, you'd kill a couple of cops for rattling your chain... which, BTW, based on your posts, you seem like the kind of guy that a) would attract chain rattling, and b) deserve, possibly need, said chain rattling.
said by Xstar_Lumini:

This trend repeats in life in other areas too. We were invited to a BBQ at a park last weekend and while there I noticed that being 40 sucks even more. The crowd was made up of people in their late teens and early 20's and their parents in their 50's and 60's. All the mature men were playing dominos on a big table and others playing poker. I tried to join them thinking they were playing for money, they were playing for free. I told my wife; "Wow what a bunch of morons, playing dominos for fun, for free? On a sunny, hot day? Wasting time with no money involved?". I told my wife that I would never waste my life like this when I hit 60. Even at age 70 I will be mobile and active and do fun stuff. I wouldn't mind playing poker or checkers but it has to be with money, like I do with my friends in my house. Every Saturday night someone goes home with an extra $300 or $400 bucks, or leaves without it. Now that's fun.

Lord forbid you do something because you enjoy it, because it's a social activity with friends? Because you can't get excited unless there's money involved? that's actually sad.
said by Xstar_Lumini:

I'm going to retire at age 55, which is more than a decade away, and when I do the first thing I'm going to buy is a brand new motorcycle, a SeaDoo, a trailer for my pick-up truck, and by that time my house in the tropics in a foreign country is going to be complete. I will tell you one thing though, I feel way more at home and comfortable with people in their 20's than with dinosaurs over 50. Don't get me wrong, one of my best friends is 56 but he still goes to nightclubs and plays soccer. If you are over 50 and don't play sports on a team or don't have a motorcycle or a Ski Doo, and you are going to spend your life playing dominos with other dinosaurs in a park bench, then you might as well visit Dr. Kevorkian and put your lights out.

Which is it? Can you not relate to people in their 20's or do you feel more comfortable with them? You're kinda all over the place here, even for you.

As for toys? Why wait - I bought a brand new bike this year; just took delivery of it 2 weeks ago... If you're in a solid financial position, and it's something you want, do it. Tomorrow's not guaranteed - I could have (arguably should have) died 2 weeks after my 42nd birthday - I'll be 45 next April, and don't live the same way as I did before my heart attack.
taraf
join:2011-05-07
Ottawa, ON

7 recommendations

taraf to cfint

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to cfint
said by cfint:

I'm not quite so old yet but I do get the ever increasing urge to yell at those damn kids these days.

Yeah. I knew I was getting old the first time I yelled at somebody to slow the F down in a residential neighbourhood...

urbanriot
Premium Member
join:2004-10-18
Canada

urbanriot to cfint

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to cfint
said by cfint:

I'm not quite so old yet but I do get the ever increasing urge to yell at those damn kids these days.

lol I did it more when I was younger than when I'm older!

Xstar_Lumini
join:2008-12-14
CANADA

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to Fergless
said by Fergless:

If only we had a choice.

The shit hit the fan when I turned 50, operation after operation.
But I don't put down others ways of living, I deal with myself and those I love. Next month I'll be 77 ( thought I'd be dead long before that)

Life goes on eh..

My hypothesis is for someone 50-70 with a healthy body not enjoying life, or leading a boring one. I know lots of 65+ seniors on Trykes and motorcycles having a blast, now that's what I'm talking about. I don't think I will ever live the boring life that some 65-year-olds have, if my legs and health are still healthy you will see me camping and riding motorcycles a lot.
Xstar_Lumini

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said by bjlockie:

said by Xstar_Lumini:

I'm going to retire at age 55, which is more than a decade away, and when I do the first thing I'm going to buy is a brand new motorcycle, a SeaDoo, a trailer for my pick-up truck, and by that time my house in the tropics in a foreign country is going to be complete.

I wonder what percentage of the population will have that kind of money at 55.

My union pension monthly cheque will be $4,900/month at 55 and by that time my toys will already be paid off because I'm working for at least 10 more years. Even if I rent a house in Cuba or Costa Rica it would be only around $600/month and I'm talking a house or condo with ALL the amenities. Look around in Facebook for homes in tropical places for rent, you will be amazed. I also have 3 kids. I'm sure they won't let their Pops starve, if each of my adult kids sends me $200/month plus my pension I can afford a mansion in the tropics. Or how about just moving to Peterborough where the rent for a house is just $1,100/month? I don't need Toronto after I retire, I don't need to commute.

Fergless
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join:2008-04-19
Toronto, ON

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One little word "IF"

There sometimes is no IF, you get the cards you're dealt.

Truth I can't walk more than 50feet or stand for any length of time.
3 Vascular operations
2002 Prostate cancer.
2002 Femoral to femoral cross over bypass
2006 Another one.
2010 Aorta Bi-Femoral Bypass.

And not long ago Essential Tremors. Most don't even know what it is, seriously...

I've had my good times, fast cars beautiful women, did 5 yrs in the Army RCEME. Travelled, immigrated to here from Belfast, got a medal lol.

Life can change in a heartbeat my friend, enjoy it while you can.

digitalfutur
Sees More Than Shown
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join:2000-07-15
GTA

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When you turn 41, you can regale in the knowledge that, based on average life expectancy for males, there are fewer days ahead than there are behind.

urbanriot
Premium Member
join:2004-10-18
Canada

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urbanriot to Xstar_Lumini

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to Xstar_Lumini
said by Xstar_Lumini:

My hypothesis is for someone 50-70 with a healthy body not enjoying life,

Oh, yea, that's a good point... everyone should exercise at least 45 minutes a day.

kingb71
join:2000-10-09
Mississauga, ON

5 recommendations

kingb71 to Xstar_Lumini

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to Xstar_Lumini
try being 50! Quit your whining

AppleGuy
Premium Member
join:2013-09-08
Kitchener, ON

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AppleGuy to urbanriot

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said by urbanriot:

said by Xstar_Lumini:

My hypothesis is for someone 50-70 with a healthy body not enjoying life,

Oh, yea, that's a good point... everyone should exercise at least 45 minutes a day.

Exercise, a shot of whiskey, and sleep. Keys to good health.

urbanriot
Premium Member
join:2004-10-18
Canada

4 recommendations

urbanriot

Premium Member

said by AppleGuy:

Exercise, a shot of whiskey, and sleep. Keys to good health.

I knew a guy that swore by for all his adult life and did it until the day he died at the age of 98. Every night before he went to sleep he took a shot of good whiskey or cognac, never missed a night.
dks01
join:2016-12-29
canada

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dks01 to Xstar_Lumini

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said by Xstar_Lumini:

said by bjlockie:

said by Xstar_Lumini:

I'm going to retire at age 55, which is more than a decade away, and when I do the first thing I'm going to buy is a brand new motorcycle, a SeaDoo, a trailer for my pick-up truck, and by that time my house in the tropics in a foreign country is going to be complete.

I wonder what percentage of the population will have that kind of money at 55.

My union pension monthly cheque will be $4,900/month at 55 and by that time my toys will already be paid off because I'm working for at least 10 more years. Even if I rent a house in Cuba or Costa Rica it would be only around $600/month and I'm talking a house or condo with ALL the amenities. Look around in Facebook for homes in tropical places for rent, you will be amazed. I also have 3 kids. I'm sure they won't let their Pops starve, if each of my adult kids sends me $200/month plus my pension I can afford a mansion in the tropics. Or how about just moving to Peterborough where the rent for a house is just $1,100/month? I don't need Toronto after I retire, I don't need to commute.

Trust me, taxes will take 30% of that if the top. And having been a landlord in Peterborough, rent for a small 2BR bungalow starts at $2000 plus utilities. Your dreams are out of touch with reality.
taraf
join:2011-05-07
Ottawa, ON

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taraf

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Maybe he's hoping that if he gets something small enough, teenage girls won't appear on his couch....

En Enfer
This account has been compromised
join:2003-07-25
Montreal, QC

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Looking back in history, and we're like, what the hell am I supposed to do now that I've hit 40?

In the 1940s-1950s, cabarets were popular but declined with the avent of television.

Up until the early 1990s, going to watch a movie at the Drive-In was something to do on weekends, either with your loved-one or hang with friends. The popularity of PayTV (Super Channel) and VHS helped the decline. Late teenagers/young adults nowadays can't afford to own a car, and they call a Uber.

We couldn't wait to turn 18 and finally enter bars and nightclubs!

Nightclubs (discothèques) had the dance music of the moment (rock&roll, disco, new wave, eurodance, rave, trance, radio hits, etc.) with slow-dance mixed-in, an underpaid DJ with mad skills handling 4 vinyl decks and stage artists on tour. Nowadays, played music don't relate to you, it's hip-hop music that sounds like a pimp talking non-stop for 4+ hours about his b****es, overpriced drinks (Coke with a hint of Rhum for 10$), and when they're not dancing, you feel like an episode of Gossip Girl where every millenial had their nose in their smartphone in a group chat and you're not part of it, but you suspect you're the one they talk about... Not your scene anymore.

As for bars, well, you don't wanna become a day-drinker and spend hours at the slot-machine trying to recoup your losses.

Theater, I dunno about ROC, but this is where Quebec star-system actors and singers from the boomer generation are making money, so theater appeals to boomers. Not so much for millenials.

Watching a movie in the 80s was simple: pay admission, buy popcorn & coke, 1 movie preview plays, studio fanfare, lights out, movie starts, you go piss during intermission (reel change), watch the rest, and get out. Nowadays, studios grab 99% of admission price so you get overpriced popcorn & drinks, endure 5 TV commercials & 5 movie previews in dim light, movie starts late. Covid took care of the cycle and movies are now released immediately on Netflix, where you can watch it on your smartphone/tablet at 1.2x speed while doing a #2 in the bathroom... What about content? Superheroes stuff. *yawn*. Hard pass.

What were your own parents doing back then to socialize? Mine went to church every sunday, I ain't wasting my time there.

The list of things to do at 40 keeps shrinking...

urbanriot
Premium Member
join:2004-10-18
Canada

urbanriot

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said by En Enfer:

Watching a movie in the 80s was simple: pay admission, buy popcorn & coke, 1 movie preview plays, studio fanfare, lights out, movie starts, you go piss during intermission (reel change), watch the rest, and get out. Nowadays, studios grab 99% of admission price so you get overpriced popcorn & drinks, endure 5 TV commercials & 5 movie previews in dim light, movie starts late.

Now people have movie theatres in their homes. No one had a 65" widescreen TV in their homes back in the 80s.
taraf
join:2011-05-07
Ottawa, ON

1 recommendation

taraf

Member

said by urbanriot:

Now people have movie theatres in their homes. No one had a 65" widescreen TV in their homes back in the 80s.

Obligatory nitpick - EDTV existed... it was 480p, but it was widescreen (usually anamorphic widescreen, like how DVD's work). I'm sure there were enthusiasts who'd buy a projector to have that. The same kind of people with more money than brains who are salivating at the prospect of getting 8k the moment it drops today.

You are right though... those kinds of things are *way* more democratized today, and when paired with all of the streaming services available it's super easy to have a much better experience than movie theaters right in the comfort of your own home. And much cheaper. If that's what you enjoy with your time, then it's well worth the price of admission. (*ducks* I'll see myself out)
dks01
join:2016-12-29
canada

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dks01 to En Enfer

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I would say you have no imagination. As one who saw 40 many years ago, I can say with certitude that life gets better.

dmd
join:2020-09-02
Kitchener, ON
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said by bjlockie:

I wonder what percentage of the population will have that kind of money at 55.

They have a name... 1%ers.

En Enfer
This account has been compromised
join:2003-07-25
Montreal, QC

En Enfer to urbanriot

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to urbanriot
said by urbanriot:

Now people have movie theatres in their homes. No one had a 65" widescreen TV in their homes back in the 80s.

TVs were becoming too heavy in bigger sizes...
quote:
The diagonal screen size of a CRT television is limited to about 40 inches because of the size requirements of the cathode ray tube, which fires three beams of electrons onto the screen, creating a viewable image. A larger screen size requires a longer tube, making a CRT television with a large screen (50 to 80 inches diagonally) unrealistic.
(Wikipedia)

I'm sure dks01 has seen the avent of television in Canada in 1952 and its transition to color in 1966.

Anyways, I wanted to point out that things your parents and grandparents used to do to socialize, paying for entertainment, were either rotten/ruined from the inside due to corporate greed or laws, or were replaced with free/cost-effective & friendly alternatives, or were faded out due to lack of generational interest or admission requirements.

Easy example, Scrabble Club rents a room every tuesday night to play for 2-3 hours, each participant (no millenials there) financially contributes for rent fees... they can now play for free with an app on their tablet.
Participants remain friends, so they meet every morning at the non-branded coffee shop while filling the games pages in yesterday's newspaper. Coffee price keep raising, it's 2.50$. (Well, coffee is currently 1$+tx at McDo and you get 2 fidelity stickers (physical + digital), but when you don't have one around...) Don't get me started on the price of a breakfast there. But insane restaurant prices make them undesirable places to hang out.
dks01
join:2016-12-29
canada

1 recommendation

dks01

Member

While our first TV was a 13” black and white with two CBC stations, larger screens are just that. I repeat, you lack imagination. Many people gather for coffee at various places daily. Breakfast not required. So what do people do? Play card games in person. Ever played 3 handed euchre? Bridge? Or board games? Lots of options. Pe rsonally, I am way too busy to any of it, however.

urbanriot
Premium Member
join:2004-10-18
Canada

urbanriot to En Enfer

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to En Enfer
said by En Enfer:

Easy example, Scrabble Club rents a room every tuesday night to play for 2-3 hours, each participant (no millenials there) financially contributes for rent fees... they can now play for free with an app on their tablet.

I feel like you might have other issues going on that are negatively influencing your opinion. What my parents did, you can still do today - sit and socialize with coffee and snacks, play cards, etc.
said by En Enfer:

Coffee price keep raising, it's 2.50$. (Well, coffee is currently 1$+tx at McDo and you get 2 fidelity stickers (physical + digital), but when you don't have one around...) Don't get me started on the price of a breakfast there. But insane restaurant prices make them undesirable places to hang out.

My wife and I went for breakfast with a couple at a restaurant in Niagara Falls, across from Sobeys, with another couple on Saturday and our breakfast was $45 with the tip and unlimited coffee. That seems like a great deal for a full plate of good food for 4 people.

If I recall a standard breakfast plate was $6 and a cheese lovers omelette was $10 (what I had). If you were by yourself you could get a full plate of breakfast food and as much coffee as you wanted for $10 if you tipped $4. That seems cheap to me... maybe don't go to McDonalds?

En Enfer
This account has been compromised
join:2003-07-25
Montreal, QC

En Enfer

Member

said by urbanriot:

you could get a full plate of breakfast food and as much coffee as you wanted for $10 if you tipped $4. That seems cheap to me...

If you're eating there, sure, you gotta pay for the kitchen staff and waiter/tress service.

After eating dinner at home, a friend called me over to a local-named rural restaurant, so I only ordered a coke. She bring a glass, a cold can (355ml) of Coke and a straw: It's gonna be 3$. Wait, what? And it's not even fountain!

Okay, when the 24-pack of soft drink are low-price in a store flyer, you can see dépanneur/corner-store owners coming to buy them there as it's cheaper than through their own distributor.. Let's say 8$ / 24 = ~0.33$ per can (+deposit). You can find a distributing machine selling them at 1$. 200% profit margin. Reasonable. But a 800% profit margin at the rural restaurant? Should I tip the waitress too?

Anyways, back on topic. Sure, some activities still exist, some are free. But wherever money is involved, some won't survive the next generation.
ugly95
join:2007-12-22
Windsor, ON

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»www.youtube.com/watch?v= ··· fhsxxmdE


But what if quoting The Simpsons is a sign that I'm not with it anymore?